PK on the Way

Journey's End

2008-08-11T15:30:00.002-04:00

Well, we've reached the end of PK's journey from the womb to the real world. It has been an incredible journey, and I am a little sad to be leaving this blog. It has been a blast sharing my pregnancy experiences online, and I am grateful to have had some regular readers.

Even though PK is now out in this crazy world of ours, there's no reason to stop blogging, which is why I've started a new blog called PK Land. Please feel free to drop in and read about PK's adventures out in the real world!

PK is Born!

2008-08-06T22:55:00.001-04:00

As I mentioned in my last post, we went to the hospital early on Wednesday morning because I was getting some regular contractions.

After I posted that last entry, my contracions suddenly got stronger and more frequent and I badly needed to sit on a toilet to feel better. After I got out of the washroom, I sat for a bit before having an uncontrollable urge to use the loo.

The pain was completely unbearable and I was re-considering the epidural. I hated myself for even thinking that because I was so passionate about having a drug-free birth.

That thought didn't last too long, because I was suddenly overcome my the urge to push! Small detail: I was still sitting on the toilet!

Out of desperation I called for help. The nurse burst into the bathroom and whisked me from the toilet to a bed so she could check how dilated I was. Turns out I was 7cm dilated from 2.5cm just one hour earlier!

I was quickly taken from triage to the labor room. By the time I got there, I was 8cm dilated, and was full-on screaming and swearing. It hurt THAT much! I was told not to push yet because I wasn't fully-dilated. I told them I needed to push ASAP, so they checked me again and this time I was fully-dilated. It was showtime.

My doctor arrived just in time for the pushing phase. I tried to do the J-breathing that we were taught in HypnoBirthing but my doctor insisted on my pushing by taking a deep breath and pushing like I was crapping. I was so afraid that by doing this, I'd wind up with burst blood vessels, but that didn't end up happening. Needless to say, it took a while for her to come out because of our slight clash. By the end of it, however, I just wanted her out and was ready to try just about anything. At one point, when PK's head wasn't fully out, I asked if they couldn't just yank her out. The doctor responded by saying that that's not how things worked. Phooey.

Unfortunately, I wound up needing an episiotomy because she wasn't coming out fast enough and her heart rate was slowing down. Needless to say, I wound up with a few stiches. So much for those perineal massages! I feel okay right now and can pee on my own with minor pain. The only thing is that I feel like someone tore me a new butt hole. Yes, very pleasant imagery, isn't it? I just hope that the recovery period is kind to me.

In the end, PK made it out. It was the most curious sensation. It was like passing a giant stool after months of serious constipation. All of a sudden my belly went from super-inflated to just flattening all of a sudden. I still have a bit of a pooch in front, but I'm told that my uterus is contracting nicely.

PK, by the way, was born at 6:43am and weighed in at 7lb 4oz. She is 52cm in length and is breat-feeding very well. She is an absolute angel who seldom ever cries and loves to be swaddled.

Since she was born so fast, the GBS antibiotic treatment was never properly administered. This means that hospital staff needed to run some tests to make sure that she is okay. So far the first test went fine. We will get the results of the second test sometime tomorrow morning.

In the meantime, I'd better get some rest. PK is sleeping so that's my cue too! I'll post a photo of her once I get home.
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In Labor!!!

2008-08-06T05:19:00.001-04:00

Well, I'm at the hospital waiting out my contractions. Although I was 2.5 cm dilated when they checked me, my contractions have been very frequent and very painful. On top of that, my water broke about 10 minutes after I got here. Since I'm GBS-positive, that's reason enough for them to keep me here.

My water breaking was a curious sensation. I felt a "pop", followed by an annoying trickle. I thought that I'd peed myself, until I realized what was actually going on.

My contractions right now are downright unbearable, but I'm hanging on, doing the slow breathing that I learned in HypnoBirthing. Easier said than done! One thing that helps is sitting up during contractions while breathing and rubbing my lower abdomen. Another was sitting on the toilet, since my bowels are being pressured like mad! Strange, a little gross, but effective!

Right now I'm freaking exhausted and could really use a nap. If only my contractions weren't so close together...
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The Real Deal?

2008-08-06T02:46:00.000-04:00

As I write this, the hubby is driving us to the hospital and I am currently getting over a nasty-ass contraction. It's 2:44am, and the roads are eerily quiet. At least it means that the drive to the hospital will be quick!

I hope that this is the real deal because I'm in a whole lot of pain and my bowels feel like they're going to explode. Pleasant thoughts, eh?

I feel another one coming one, so this is my cue for exit. Maybe the next update you get will be to say that PK has arrived! Either that or there will be an angry post from me saying that we were sent home. :P
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Counting Contractions

2008-08-05T22:43:00.001-04:00

Ever since I got back from the doctor today, it seems that my contractions have gotten stronger and a little more regular. At this point, however, I can't say with confidence that this warrants a trip to the hospital.

Being the geek that I am, I started noting the contractions on my BlackBerry. The hubby, being an even bigger geek has decided to post the numbers on MS Excel and has even gone as far as plotting a graph of my contractions! I'll have to post the Excel worksheet later because it's too friggin' hillarious!

As my contractions get stronger, I'm finding it harder to do anything else other than just try to breathe through them. A friend of mine who had recently had a baby said that one of the most beneficial things she did while in labor was uttering a low grunt while breathing out.

I've gotten pretty creative in dealing with my contractions by uttering "mooooo" as I breathe out. I figure that I might as well have fun with it.

Well, gotta run. I'm in the middle of managing a contraction. We'll see what comes of this...
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Dilation Update

2008-08-05T19:56:00.003-04:00

I got back from the doctor's office a couple of hours ago, and in spite of my more frequent and painful Braxton-Hicks contractions, my bowels feeling like they're turning inside-out, my mucus plug passing and having the bloody show yesterday, it turns out that I'm only 1 cm dilated. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!! I really need to learn to relax, don't I? ;-)

False Alarm

2008-08-05T14:41:00.002-04:00

Last night I almost ended up in labor and delivery triage. I was up late, messing around on the computer, when I started noticing some contractions. What caught my attention was that they seemed to be pretty frequent. So I started keeping time of when each contraction started. This was just after 1am. By 2am, it looked like the contractions were about 5-7 minutes apart, but I still went to bed. By 3am I started worrying that I might be going into labor, since the contractions seemed be 2 minutes apart, and they seemed to be stronger.

I called labor and delivery triage at my hospital, to ask if I should come in. They said that I probably should, so I woke up the hubby and I started getting ready. That's when I noticed that the contractions had suddenly become less intense and less frequent. It was starting to look like a false alarm. The hubby and I stayed up a bit longer to time some of the contractions and consulted our pregnancy books for some words of wisdom. After about 30 minutes, we realized that the contractions were lasting anywhere between 30 and 60 seconds, and that the time between contractions wasn't regular enough - anywhere between 2 and 7 minutes. Needless to say, we aborted our trip to the hospital.

I have a doctor's appointment a little later today, so I'll probably have him check under the hood to see how things are progressing. Maybe he'll even monitor my contractions to see if it warrants going to the hospital. Even if my doctor determines that PK is not ready to come out just yet, I don't think it will be much longer than one week until PK pops out.

Fearful

2008-08-05T00:27:00.002-04:00

As L-Day approaches, I'm starting to feel some anxiety. The anxiety isn't around the labor itself. Nine months ago, if you'd asked me, I would've said that I was terrified of going into labor. Nowadays, I think that I'm as ready as I'll ever be. I guess nobody is ever truly ready. That being said, the combination of my pre-natal exercise class discussions and the HypnoBirthing class have put me much more at ease about this whole labor thing. My fears right now are broken down into main parts: pre-delivery, and post-delivery.

On the pre-delivery side of things, my biggest fear is of delivering a stillborn child. It's a terribly morbid thought, but it's always crossing my mind, especially as I get closer and closer to delivering. What if PK is okay one minute, but not okay the next? What if the umbilical cord gets tangled around her neck? Even as I write this, these very thoughts make me cringe. I also worry about all of the coughing and sneezing fits that I've had over the last couple of days. It's one thing to have been coughing in January/February, when PK was surrounded by a thick cushion of amniotic fluid. Even when I had my April/May allergies, she had a pretty nice cushion. Now things are crowded in utero, so whenever I sneeze or cough, I worry about hurting her.

For post-delivery, I wonder what type of baby PK will be. Every parent hopes for a healthy child. But what if the delivery itself causes her harm - brain damage, physical deformation, or something else that I can't even fathom. Or what if PK has a congenital defect, or some sort of developmental disability? How would I deal with that? I truly admire parents of special-needs children. They are truly brave and loving souls. Would I ever step up like these parents were I placed in a similar situation? My honest answer is that I don't know, and that scares me. I hope I would. At the same time, I don't want to find out. Does that make me a bad person?

I know that these are all "what ifs", and but they're out there. If they don't affect PK, they will affect some other kid out there. It's a scary world out there, and I don't blame PK for wanting to hang out in utero for a little while longer.

Getting Closer!

2008-08-05T00:08:00.003-04:00

This evening I was greeted by some blood after I went to the washroom. I thought I had already passed my mucus plug, but maybe that was some preliminary goop. This discharge was goopy but it was more red-tinged than the previous one. The previous one was more browny than red.

I've never gone into labor before, so I obviously don't know what to expect. Books are fine, but the real deal is always different for everyone. I called my sis for some insight/advice, but unfortunately she hasn't gotten to that part in her medical training. Next, the hubby and I consulted our various baby books for signs of labor. From what we've read, the the bleeding I was experienced may very well have been the bloody show (I think that the mucus plug/bloody show are pretty much the same thing). It wasn't heavier than a period, but it reminded me of the very early stages of a period.

I'm not seeing the doctor until tomorrow afternoon, but I think I might give him a ring tomorrow morning just to check. PK seems to be moving about, and the bleeding appears to have subsided. I guess all this just means that PK is on her way out soon!

Week 39

2008-08-04T17:59:00.003-04:00

I've still got about half a week until PK is officially due, but just in case she happens to come before then, I thought I'd get a jump-start on the update for this week of gestation.

I have to admit that I'm a bit torn. On the one hand, I really want PK to come out. I'm so curious to see what she looks like and who she resembles the most. On the other hand, it has been nice to enjoy these last few days off to myself and with the hubby. It has been good to say goodbye to the old lifestyle without PK, and to start getting used to the thought of having a new lifestyle with PK. Not only that, this extra time to myself has allowed me to read some of my baby books so that I know what to expect post-partum. The two books I'm currently reading are The Mother of all Baby Books and The Happiest Baby on the Block. The first book starts off by talking about the last few weeks of pregnancy, and then talks about the post-partum period, including how to change diapers, breast-feeding, and caring for the baby's umbilical cord stump. The second book is all about the so-called "fourth trimester" and how to keep fussy, colicky babies happy. That fills me with confidence, because at least I know that there are proven techniques out there for dealing with colicky babies, so hopefully I won't have to fret as much if PK ends up being such a baby.

While I do think that I will miss PK's kicking and squirming (it is still my absolute favorite thing about pregnancy), I will most certainly not miss the lack of mobility that I have these days. While I think I've managed to avoid the dreaded pregnancy waddle (either that, or I'm totally delusional), it has been extra-hard for me to do the following things:

- shave my legs
- cut my toenails
- sleep for more than 2 hours at a time without having to get up to pee
- tie my shoes
- put moisturizer and/or sunscreen on my legs

Apart from getting up to pee every 2 hours at night (can't be helped), I'm still managing with all of the other items above - it's just getting difficult, and I have to get pretty creative. For example, when I tie my running shoes, I find that it's easiest to do a nice wide squat (like one of the recommended labor positions).

Sleep, or lack thereof, has probably been the biggest inconvenience of all. For months I was worried about the fact that I kept waking up on my back, even though all of the pregnancy books tell you that you're not supposed to be lying flat on your back after month 4 or 5 (or something along those lines). I mentioned this to my doctor, and he told me not to worry. He said that the body naturally feels so uncomfortable when you're on your back later on in pregnancy, that I will likely stop waking up on my back at some point. Well, it took a while, but he was right. I think that sometime between 7.5 and 8 months, it finally hit me. There was NO WAY I could wake up on my back or even lie on my back propped up by two pillows because it felt REALLY REALLY uncomfortable. Ah, nature at work!

Even lying on my side is proving to be really uncomfortable. Last night, I couldn't fall asleep on my left or right side because I was having trouble breathing. So I propped myself upright with 3 pillows just so I could fall asleep. When I CAN fall asleep on my sides, I have to constantly switch sides, because my hips are in so much pain. I hear that it's best to sleep on your left while pregnant, so I try to do that, but I'm finding it really difficult to do so nowadays because lying on my left side is aggravating an old shoulder injury from climbing.

Since I'm getting such crappy sleep, my body makes up for it by forcing me to nap during the day or in the evening. I say force because I'm not a napper by nature. Yesterday, for example, we were running a few errands before going grocery shopping. On the way over to the supermarket, I told the hubby that I needed to sit down because I was feeling a bit tired. Next thing I know, I'm sitting there in the middle of this mall, with my head leaning against his shoulder, taking a nap. I think I was out for 20 or 30 minutes. Later that same evening, I sat down to read a book, and zonked out after reading 4 or 5 pages. I only woke up because my sister called me to say hello. That same evening, I was sitting in bed reading, and fell asleep after 4 or 5 pages. The thing is, I feel most refreshed after I take these naps, so I try to embrace them, rather than resist them.

One thing I've found rather amusing in the last few weeks is the timing of when people would like PK to make her world début. I wanted at least 1 week off before PK came out. That way I could tie up loose ends and have some time off to myself - not to mention enjoy my kitchen! The hubby wants PK to come out sometime tomorrow. That way we had the long weekend to ourselves, and he'd take 3 weeks off from work starting on Tuesday, and returning sometime after Labor Day (the September holiday, not MY labor day :P). My sister wanted PK to come this weekend, because she was in town and would be able to stick around for the birth. Next weekend is no good for her because she's on-call for her obstetrics rotation. Plus she goes to school out-of-town and it would take her a couple of hours give or take to make it over here. So since apparently I'm taking orders, when would you like PK to come out?

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. It was shifted to Tuesday because of the long weekend, so I suspect that he'll be an hour late to see me. I'm thinking of asking him to do another cervical exam to see if I've dilated at all since last time. From what my sis tells me, I shouldn't expect the doctor to check my cervix this week, though a lot of women in my position ask for it, if they want to avoid being induced. I'm also going to ask him about my suspicions of having passed my mucus plug. I'm pretty sure that I did pass it, and that it's not left-over discharge related to last week's cervical exam. That bleeding/discharge had subsided a few days earlier. I think at this point I may refrain from doing the perineal massages, just in case the mucus plug did pass. I know that PK is still protected by amniotic fluid, but just in case I'm leaking fluid and I don't know it, I don't want to take any chances, especially since I'm GBS-positive (bleh).

Rather than subway up like we usually do, we're thinking of driving up to the doctor's office tomorrow, just in case I'm actually dilated enough to the point where he'd recommend that I check myself into the hospital. My bags are now fully-packed (or at least packed enough), so we'd be prepared just in case.

On a more annoying note, the cold that started last week has morphed into a coughing, sneezing, and stuffy nose fest. I was hoping that it would subside by tomorrow, since will make it a week to the day of when my sore throat started, but I think it may be another week until it's completely gone. It seems to be progressing very very slowly, and it certainly doesn't help with my sleep situation.

And finally, PK still continue to move a fair bit in utero. Sometimes I feel like she's not quite as active as she used to be, which makes me worry. That being said, all of the literature out there says that babies seem to move less later into gestation because there's less room in the uterus. I don't find that particularly comforting, since I'm so used to her moving a lot. Sometimes when I don't feel her moving, I like to coax her into moving by either doing some pelvic floor exercises or leaning forward. That usually gets her moving. I don't think that she find that particularly disruptive, since I usually only get a foot jab from her out of that. Good enough for me. I just want to know that she's okay in there.

Whew! That was a mouthful! The race is on! Only 3 more days until I'm due. Will I be one of the 5% of women who actually has their baby on their due date? Will PK come just before? Will PK come just after? Will PK need to be induced? Stay tuned!

Hurry Up and Wait

2008-08-04T17:24:00.002-04:00

I have 3 days until my due date, yet PK is still sitting pretty comfortably in my womb. They (whoever "they" are) say that walking and going up stairs can help induce labor. In my case, I don't think that that's going to work. I've got a ton of stairs in my house (each room is on its own floor), and I walk A LOT as part of my exercise routine. PK is too used to my moving about, so no amount of walking or stair climbing I do will coax her out of her comfy little coccoon!

Now, even though PK has not yet arrived, I do think that we're fast approaching L-Day. First off, she has dropped since last Monday. I didn't find PK's drop as dramatic as everyone says it is, where all of a sudden you've been released from your squished-up-lung prison, and eating is no longer an indigestion-laden ordeal. I did have have trouble breathing, which I noticed mostly when I worked out, walked, or went up stairs, but it wasn't THAT bad. Also, I didn't really have that much indigestion. I was pretty much able to eat the same portions that I did before PK started squishing my innards.

All that aside, she DID drop. My belly now looks pear-shaped, and the trouble breathing I had seems to have gone away. I just didn't feel like it was that dramatic a change. Maybe it's because PK moved down slowly.

I've also noticed that the Braxton-Hicks contractions are more frequent and more powerful. That being said, there's no set pattern to them, so I know it's not time just yet.

And finally - and I'm not 100% sure on this one - I think I passed my mucus plug this morning. I'll probably confirm that with my doctor when I see him tomorrow. This means that labor can start anytime between sometime today, and sometime in the next few days. No kidding...

Grrrrrrrrrrr...

2008-07-31T16:12:00.002-04:00

Yesterday I was feeling a slight tingling in my throat, and today I've got a full-on sore throat. Not exactly what I had in mind for the days leading up to PK's arrival. Naturally, I'm not too pleased by the entire situation. For one thing, I HATE HATE HATE being sick (I know that I'm in for a rude awakening once PK starts daycare). The other thing is that since I'm pregnant, I can't take anything to relieve my symptoms. I already went through such misery back in January and February, after having caught 3 colds in a row, with the middle cold being the evil of all evils. I'm not exactly looking forward to what this unwanted bug will bring.

Unfortunately, this was bound to happen. Tons of people are sick these days. Not to mention the fact that I had a few day-long meetings last week one of my co-workers who sick kept coughing in my direction. I wish that people would just stay home when they're sick like that. My current workplace isn't like my old workplace where they kept track of how many sick days you took and when during the week it happened. Arrrgh! So aggravating!!!

I'm hoping that maybe I can make this bug go away by flushing out the toxins from my body with lots of water and lots of sweating. Some of my hard-core workout friends swear by this. I definitely have nothing to lose. Right now, my den feels like a furnace so I'm hoping that it's hot enough to sweat this little bug out. I'm trying not to go too far on the sweating thing because I don't want to endanger PK. I just don't want to be sick!!!

You Know You're Almost Due When... - Part 2

2008-07-31T15:56:00.004-04:00

Second-time moms have told me that one of the most annoying questions they get close to their due date is whether or not the baby has arrived yet. The rumors really start flying if the expectant mom suddenly disappears.

In my case, since I'm on mat-leave, I didn't want people to start thinking that PK had arrived yet because they didn't see me online as often anymore. Sure, I log on for a bit here and there, but I'm no longer glued to the computer. Naturally the rumors would start flying, especially if people didn't know that I was already on mat-leave. In order to keep such rumors from spreading, the first thing I did once I finished work last Friday was to update my status on Facebook, GTalk, and MSN Instant Messenger: "mat-leave = yes, baby = not yet". So unless my status changes on any of these three media, it's safe to assume that PK is still nicely tucked away in the womb, enjoying her last few days before joining the real world. :)

You Know You're Almost Due When...

2008-07-31T11:13:00.002-04:00

Yesterday I was at Ikea with my mom to buy some chairs to go with the kitchen table that we bought for our new kitchen. You can either blame or curse technology for this, but I was down to two chairs that I liked, so I took pictures of them and mailed them on to the hubby to get his opinion. I also decided to follow that up with a phone call, for a head's up so that we could make a decision quickly.

Of course, I keep forgetting that PK can pop out at any minute now, and that a phone call from me could be the "I'm in labor" call...which is what he thought when he picked up the phone. Apparently he'd been in a meeting and had stepped out because he thought it was time for PK to make her world début. :P

He told me later that when he returned to his meeting, he interrupted the meeting saying something to the effect of, "Yeah, my wife's not in labor. She just wanted me to look at some chairs." Man, do I ever feel domesticated...

BTW, here are the chairs in question. Which one would you pick?

A Momentous Occasion

2008-07-29T17:14:00.004-04:00

My driver's license is up for renewal on my b-day this year (end of August), and seeing as I might be a tad busy at that time, I thought it would be good to get a jump-start on the renewal process and do it before PK arrives. Nothing terribly exciting there. What IS exciting is that I've decided to change my name on my license! After 5 years of marriage, I figured that it was about time. Besides that, I think that if I have my married name on my license and on my passport, I'd get less flack if I were to travel alone with PK by plane or cross-border.

I'm not sure how it works in other provinces and territories in Canada, but in Ontario I can get away with assuming the hubby's name, rather than legally changing my name. That's a huge relief because I don't need to change all of my identification, including birth certificate. That part alone is good because I wasn't born here, so god only knows how annoying that would be. Besides that, the name change process itself is a royal pain in the butt requiring original documents of this and that up the wazoo. Assuming the hubby's name is waaaaaaaaay more convenient.

Even though I was changing my name on the license, it wasn't too painful a process. All I needed to do was bring my marriage certificate with me, and they'd change my name for me. I'd initially wanted to use my maiden name as my middle name, and my married name as my last name. Unfortunately, they don't allow for that - I can only change my last name. I'd initially thought that my options were either using my married name, or using the dreaded hyphen (sorry readers with hyphenated last names). Fortunately, I was given the option of using my maiden name followed by my married name separated by a SPACE. Yay! So now I've got a really long-ass name on my license, but at least I avoided the hyphenation thing. :P

Next stop, passport renewal. That doesn't expire for another year, so I've go time on my side.

Bra-Tacular!

2008-07-29T16:53:00.002-04:00

One of my missions on my first day of mat-leave was to buy some more nursing bras. I'd bought one way back, sometime during mid-pregnancy. At the time, the lady doing my fitting at the bra store advised me to come back once I was closer to my due date, since my ribs would be more expanded and my boobs would balloon up once the milk started coming in. Maybe it's because I see myself every day, but I don't think that my boobs have really grown since that first fitting, and I don't think that my ribcage has expanded all that much either.

At any rate, seeing as I only had the one nursing bra, I needed to get at least a couple more. The store I went to was the same one where I got my maternity bras and my one nursing bra - Secrets from Your Sister. I went with them because they were recommended in my pre-natal fitness classes and because they do bra fittings. Before that, I'd never been fitted for a bra. That being said, I think their fitting people are on crack, because they keep telling me that I'm a 32 around the chest, and experience has shown me that 32 is quite constricting (i.e. can't breathe all that well). They also claim that I'm a D-cup, but I don't think I've grown much more than a C-cup.

And yet, I still came out of the store spending $230 on 2 nursing bras and a nursing tank. Why, do you ask? Because:
1. I don't have the bloody patience to be running around looking for nursing bras.
2. The bras I got are really cute. :P
3. The bras actually fit just fine with the back extender, which may actually mean that when my ribs shrink back to their original size, the 32 might fit me.
4. The D-cup is probably a good idea because I'm sure that while I'm nursing, I'll end up with big-ish boobs anyway.

That being said, I realized that I forgot to buy a neutral-colored nursing bra for wearing with white shirts. I might just hit up La Senza or Thyme Maternity for one of those. Hopefully I'll pay less than at this store. I might actually try to get another nursing tank as well. The one I bought cost like $75, which is rather steep. Hopefully I can find one for less at one of these chains.

Week 38

2008-07-29T16:20:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I went to see the doctor, and as part of the visit, he checked to see if PK's "landing gear" had been deployed. I'd been having some serious cramping a few days before, so I was totally certain that my cervix would be dilated at least 3 or 4 cm. It turns out that I'm barely even dilated (i.e. < 1cm), which was disappointing. I know, I know. I did say that I wanted some time to myself before PK arrives, so it's not such a bad thing. I just don't want to be induced, because I know that that will make for a more painful labor and it may cause me to cave on the epidural, which would mean that my mother-in-law's eye-rolling wins. On top of that, it seems that my cervix is in some weird position, so the doctor said that might make for a longer, more painful labor. Bleh. I'm just going to ignore that last little bit. I'm still convinced that I will have a nice labor. Maybe not pain-free, but at least one where I can manage the pain. :D

On the bright side, he was able to feel PK's head when he poked at my cervix, which means that she's starting to engage somewhat. The ultrasound also confirmed that the head was down, the spine was on my left-hand side, and the feet were on my right. No surprise there. Apparently this is a very common position for babies to be in towards the end.

When I got home from the doctor's office, I noticed some blood on my underwear. Now, I'd been told that there would be some spotting as a result of the cervical exam, but this seemed like more than spotting, so I called the doctor's office. The secretary assured me that since I wasn't bleeding more than a period, I was fine. Still...it caught me a bit by surprise. After that, the blood turned more from red to brown, and I passed a small bit of brownish mucus. At first I thought it was the so-called bloody show, but the books appear to indicate that the bloody show is either red or pinkish in color and that the brown mucusy gunk is most likely the result of a cervical exam. WHEW!

At the same time, I think that the cervical exam must've kick-started something. I've been cramping up more than usual, and the cramping has gotten more intense. There is no pattern to the cramping, however, so I think that they're just Braxton-Hicks contractions. One "new" pain that I've started experiencing, however, is this bizarre pain on my left lower-back. It runs from my mid-back to my lumbar area, and it feels like a period cramp on my back. I was woken up by such a pain early this morning, and it took a while for it to go away. I then felt it again in the late morning, just after 11am. No signs of it since then. I'll probably mention that to the doctor when I see him next week.

Besides Monday being my doctor's appointment, it was also an important milestone for me - my first day of mat-leave! YOINKS! This whole thing is still very surreal to me - and I'm sure it will be even more surreal once PK arrives. Right now, it feels like I'm on vacation. I can sleep in, run errands, and goof off. At the same time, I spent part of my first day on mat-leave cleaning up the kitchen after the plumbers came by to finish up. How domestic is that? It made me feel like a bit of a housewife, which made me cringe. Nothing against any housewives out there. My mom and my mother-in-law are both housewives, and I KNOW that it's a tiring and thankless job. In some ways, it's harder than being out there in the workforce. It's just not for me. I like the idea of working and earning my own money. We keep separate bank accounts, which I find empowering and other people just find plain weird. Now that I'm going on mat-leave, however, I'll be getting an allowance from the hubby once my top-up payments are done. How WEIRD!

Oh, before I forget, I did finally get the Depends for when PK arrives. I took the plunge on Sunday. It needed to be done. I don't want to be ruining perfectly good underwear at the hospital due to massive post-partum bleeding. I also got a bunch of overnight pads for when the Depends run out and/or when the bleeding isn't quite as heavy. Ah, Life's necessary evils!

LOL Moment

2008-07-28T15:58:00.001-04:00

Today, at long last, the plumber came by to finish up the sink and dishwasher installations. They weren't at the house for too long - just 30-40 minutes - after which we finally had a functioning kitchen!!!

I was so happy and excited that I called my mom to tell her the news. This is what our conversation was like:

ME: Hi Mom!
MOM: Are you in labor?

ME: No. I was just calling to say that the plumber came by!
MOM: You're having a baby girl?

ME: No...the <I>plumber</I> came by!!!
MOM: Oh. So no baby yet?

ME: Nope!
MOM: Oh...
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Stranger Dream

2008-07-28T10:01:00.002-04:00

I think it has been a while since I've done any blogging on my weird pregnancy dreams, namely because there's been a bit of a dry spell. That is, until Saturday night. I had a FREAKING WEIRD dream that night, and I felt compelled to share.

The dream started out just fine. I was giving birth to PK. The birth itself was great. Thanks to my wonderful HypnoBirthing techniques, I was laboring at the hospital for about 1 hour. I don't know how realistic that is for a first child. Odds are, not very realistic, since I'll have to be at the hospital at least 4 hours in advance to receive antibiotics for that pesky GBS bug. At any rate, the labor was great, and it was all done in a flash.

The next thing I remember is realizing that after the birth, there was no skin-to-skin contact with PK, nor was their any attempt made for me to breast-feed PK. To top it all off, I realized that PK was in a small basket, like those gift baskets that they sell at Babies R Us, and that she was covered with a sheet. I started freaking out because I'd wondered if she'd suffocated overnight. I was distraught because it had been a long journey with PK, and I didn't want to risk anything happening to her. When I lifted PK from the basket, she felt more like a doll than a baby, and I kept checking to see if she was breathing. Finally, it sounded like she was. Whew! Sigh of relief!

After that scare, I thought I'd try breast-feeding. That didn't work out so well, because she'd twisted my left breast such that her mouth was on the breast itself, but the nipple was sticking out of her mouth. So I gently put my pinky in her mouth so she'd let go of the bad latch. For whatever reason, I didn't pursue the breast-feeding thing any further...or any type of feeding, for that matter.

Next, I thought I'd try changing PK's diaper. When I held her up, she looked like a miniature version of my pediatrician. Basically, she didn't look like a baby - just like a shrunken adult who happened to look like my pediatrician. That struck me as a teensy bit odd, but not that much. I began the process of removing her clothes so that I could change her. It seemed like I kept peeling layer after layer of clothing. Until I got to the end...a wedge piece of some creamy cheese. That's what was left of PK after I'd taken her clothes off to change her - CHEESE!!!

And that was the end of my dream. Freaking weird, if you ask me. I have NO IDEA what it all means. Any interpretations are welcome! :)

The Pediatrician

2008-07-28T09:26:00.003-04:00

When I posted the update for Week 37, I forgot to mention the fact that we'd met with our new pediatrician on July 17th for a pre-natal visit. I was already pretty impressed by the fact that they even DID pre-natal visits, so that was a good sign. I can't remember if I'd mentioned this before, but I got the pediatrician's name from a new mom that I'd met at a friend's wedding back in May.

I'm glad we were able to secure a pediatrician for PK, because - and I may have mentioned this before - I don't particularly trust family doctors. I figure that since pediatricians deal with kids exclusively, there's a better chance that if PK had some nasty ailment a pediatrician would fare better than a family doc. The residency period for family medicine in Canada is only two years (compared to at least 5 years for all other programs), and most med students choose it either because they want an easy life or because they couldn't get into their first-choice residency program. Very sobering facts, and they definitely don't add to my confidence in family doctors. That being said, there are good doctors and bad doctors everywhere. I just have yet to find a good family doc. But I digress...

So, back to my story. The hubby called the pediatrician and made arrangements for our pre-natal visit. Fortunately - and to my surprise and delight - we didn't need a referral from a family doc, so getting the appointment was relatively easy. The pediatrician's office is not quite as close as we'd like, but fortunately it's a 15-minute ride on the subway, and that particular subway station has an elevator, so it's stroller-friendly. Yay!

When we got there, we were led into an examination room right away, and then we waited. And waited. And waited. I think we were seen one hour later, which, for being in the examination room, is quite a long time to be waiting. Then we found out why there was the delay. There are two doctors in the practice, Dr. X and Dr. Y. When the hubby made the appointment, he'd made it for Dr. Y - i.e. NOT the one given to us by the girl at the wedding, Dr. X). When we got to the office, however, he'd gotten the names mixed up, and told the lady at reception that we were seeing Dr. X instead of Dr. Y. So in the end we ended up seeing Dr. X (original referral) even though we'd made the appointment for Dr. Y. :P Confused yet?

At least the wait was worth it. The doctor was extremely pleasant and mild-mannered. And as an extra bonus, she has kids of her own, so she can actually practice what she preaches. Before taking any questions from us, she gave us a little spiel about the practice. First off, she told us all about how both doctors in the practice cover for each other, so even if one doctor is away due to illness or whatever, the other doctor is there to take on the extra caseload. And she said that if you need an appointment at the last minute (i.e. the day you're calling), they always accommodate. On top of that, she also mentioned that they're part of a group of pediatricians that are on-call in the evenings and weekends, so if you have any questions or concerns, you always have phone access to a pediatrician up to 10pm every evening. Freaking awesome!

In the end, it was a very fruitful visit, and I'm very glad that we were able to book a pre-natal appointment. It's nice to know that there are all of these support services available to PK. It's also nice to know that I can bug her for resources on lactation consultants, post-partum depression (knock on wood that I won't have to), and other post-partum related items. It definitely makes me more at ease to know that PK is in good hands and that so are we.

Week 37

2008-07-27T22:24:00.002-04:00

I was totally convinced that PK would be making her world début partway into my 37th week. On the opening night for "The Dark Night", I was sitting in the theater watching the movie like everyone else, when all of a sudden I started getting some major cramping. I dismissed the cramps as Braxton-Hicks initially, but started worrying when they wouldn't stop. Finally, they did. I guess PK wasn't ready to come out just yet. On a similar note, one girl in my aqua-fitness class who was due the same day as me (August 7th) ended up having her baby at 37 weeks on the nose.

As with the past few weekends leading up to PK's due date, we've spent most of our time scrambling around buying odds and ends. One of the things I still had to do was buy some disposable undies for the hospital, seeing as I've read (and have been told) that there is some crazy bleeding that happens post-partum. I was all ready to buy myself a pack of Depends, when I suddenly started feeling all self-conscious and abandoned my mission. That was probably not the smartest thing to do, but as I've said before, I've never claimed to be rational at all times.

On the Monday, I had my usual weekly doctor's appointment. Nothing terribly exciting happened there. PK's head is still in the right spot. Hurray! He told me that the following week, he'd do an internal exam to see if PK's "landing gear" had deployed. That totally cracked me up. It was a nice euphemism for saying he'd check if my cervix was dilated. My sister tells me that when they do these types of exams, it can sometimes trigger the onset of labor, and that if labor does start, it's usually within 24 hours of the exam. I'd considered waiving that exam after she told me this, because my last day at the office was July 25th, and I wanted at least one week to myself before PK arrived. Seeing as my next doctor's appointment is on July 27th, there's a possibility that checking under the hood might trigger labor on the 28th and therefore nix any of my plans for actual time off before PK arrives. After giving it some thought, I think I'll still go ahead with the exam. PK will come out when she's ready. If I go into labor on the 28th, then so be it.

Speaking of mat-leave, I did decide that July 25th would be my last day at the office after all. As I'd mentioned in my last post, I'd tinkered with the idea of working part-time after the 25th, but the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a hair-brained idea. Who am I kidding. I need some "me time" before PK arrives. Besides, my attention span during meetings has gotten worse, and I am increasingly more tired overall. I've been so tired lately that I skipped out on my pre-natal Yoga class this week. I really wasn't up for the torture workout that I usually get. That being said, I went home and worked out all the same - arm-toning with the TheraBands and leg toning with some fabulous squats. Believe me, that was still a lot less intense than the Yoga class.

On a final note, here's the latest on the kitchen. Counters were installed on Monday (July 21st), so our kitchen finally looks like a kitchen! The plumber also came by that week, to install the sinks and the toilet. As of today, we have a working toilet, but the sinks are half-done. The faucet for the kitchen sink has been installed, and the sink has been mounted (it's an under-mount sink), but the drain for the sink and the dishwasher hasn't been set up yet. I'm a little miffed because the drain was never set up because the sink needed to be glued in place. The plumber didn't come until Wednesday, so they could've mounted the sink before then. Oh well...c'est la vie. The bathroom sink has been put in place, but the faucet wasn't installed because they couldn't remember if the faucet was going to be to the left or right of the sink, so they hadn't drilled the hole for the faucet when the counters were installed. Our cell #s are posted in the front hall, so a simple phone call to ask would've sufficed. Arrrrrrrrrrrgh! We were told that the final plumbing work would be done on Monday, July 28th, at the latest, so hopefully we'll have a working kitchen by then. On the bright side, everything has been cleaned up in the kitchen area, so we were at least able to move our kitchen paraphernalia into the kitchen. Yay!

I just hope that I get to enjoy my working kitchen for a day or two - I've been itching to bake cookies :D - before PK arrives. I guess I'm getting pretty demanding. Enjoying time off, being able to do some baking...all before PK arrives! Will it happen? Only PK knows the answer to that question!

Me at 37 Weeks

Pick-up

2008-07-25T19:05:00.000-04:00

There must be some love potion that my pregnant body is emitting, because the number of guys trying to pick me up in the last few months has been unbelievable.

Just today, I was going into a subway station on my way to work when this random guy starts talking to me and asks if I'm Italian. I say "No," smile, and walk awaym

A few seconds later I see him on the subway platform again, and he keeps pressing me on where I'm from, oblivious to the fact that I've got my headphones on and therefore don't wish to engage in conversation. So I turn around and tell him that I'm from Brazil and THAT'S when he says, "Oh, I didn't realize that you were pregnant. Otherwise I wouldn't have kept bothering you."

Dude, how about checking for a wedding ring? Anyway, he walked away, and that was that.

Although I found the guy irritating (and definitely kind of creepy), I do find the whole situation very amusing when a look back at it.
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Bittersweet

2008-07-25T18:53:00.001-04:00

Today was my last day at the office. As of next week, I'll be on mat-leave. While I'm relieved to be taking some time off befor PK arrives (assuming I don't go into labor tonight :P), I am sad to be leaving, even if it's only for a few months.

My co-workers have not only been great to work with, I've actually ENJOYED my job! In addition to that, my co-workers actually appreciate the work that I've done to date. This is a very stark contrast to previous workplaces, so I am very grateful for the opportunity and experience.

But, alas, life goes on, and it's time to move on with the next phase of my life. I'm sure that taking care of PK will be as busy as a full-time job, especially in the first few weeks of her life - oh, who am I kidding...it'll be for much longer than that! Besides, work will still be there in a few months. Let the new phase of my journey begin!
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Stuck on the Subway

2008-07-25T08:56:00.000-04:00

I am stuck on the subway and late for my 9am meeting on my last day at work before taking mat-leave. Great way to start the day, eh?

All that aside, I really need to pee. I've got one more stop to go, but at the rate this train is moving, I may explode. Let's hope that that doesn't happen...
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Home Stretch

2008-07-24T11:25:00.002-04:00

As of today, I've only got 2 weeks until my due date! I can't believe how time has flown by! On the one hand, I really want PK to pop out already. On the other hand, I want to keep her in there just a bit longer. Tomorrow is my last day at work, and I'd like to enjoy at least one week to myself before taking the plunge into parenthood. I don't think that PK is quite ready to come out yet, just because I haven't felt her drop into my pelvis quite yet. But who knows...things can change quite rapidly now, can't they?

The kitchen is still not done (more on that later), so the race is on. Who will win? Will it be the kitchen or PK? Feel free tell me your guesses!

Tickle Tickle Tickle

2008-07-24T11:05:00.004-04:00

For the past few weeks, PK has been co-operative and has been in the head-down position. This has been a huge relief, seeing as it means that a C-section will be less likely. I say less likely because you just never know with these things, do you?

At any rate, she's propped herself in some awkward position because her head is not quite aligned with center of my hips - it's slightly off to the left, and while her back is in the anterior-ish position, it's hanging out more to the left side. Which means that every once in a while, one of her feet tends to poke out of my right side (just like she's doing right now). I actually love that sensation. Last week she poked out so much at one point, that it looked like I had a little cone protruding out of my right side. It sure impressed the hubby!

I'm not the belly-rubbing type at all, but whenever she does that, I like to put my hand where her foot pokes out, and rub the area. It's cool to feel her foot retract when I do that. The hubby also gets a kick out of it (pardon the pun), and whenever PK pokes her little foot out, he tickles her foot, saying "Tickle tickle tickle!" It's really really cute. I've noticed that he really enjoys rubbing my belly overall these days - maybe because it's looking so round - it beckons a rubbing. It's really sweet when he does it. The look on his face is just priceless. There's so much love in his eyes for this unborn child. It's like he melts as soon as he touches my belly or addresses PK. Very endearing. I think he'll make a great father.

Week 36

2008-07-16T22:02:00.002-04:00

I have to admit that I was half-expecting to go into labor over the weekend. I was feeling a combination overall ick and this horrid fatigue that I'd never felt before - not even in my first trimester. The Braxton Hicks that I've been feeling also didn't help.

I've been feeling Braxton Hicks on and off since the onset of the third trimester, but I didn't really realize what it was until quite recently. I just figured that they were third trimester cramps, since all of the literature about Braxton Hicks seems to indicate that the symptoms feel like nothing more than a bit of tightening of the uterus. I finally laid that to rest a couple of weeks ago when I asked my doctor about the cramps, and he told me what they were. Even though they're rather uncomfortable I take it all in stride. Whenever I get the cramping, I practice one of the breathing techniques that I learned in my HypnoBirthing classes for dealing with uterine surges (HypnoBirthing term for contractions). It actually makes the pain a lot more bearable and it's great practice for when I actually do go into labor.

I saw the doctor on Monday again (now that my appointments are weekly), and got the results of my GBS swab. Not surprisingly, the test results came out positive. This basically means that I have to come to the hospital at the onset of labor, since they have to administer antibiotics intravenously for at least 4 hours. It's a bit of an inconvenience, I admit, and definitely puts a cramp in birth plan, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

On Monday, the hubby and I went on our hospital tour. I won't bore you with the gory details since I'd already done a nice long post on it. The short of it is that it was useful, and definitely overwhelming in some ways, since it really really made this whole baby thing seem all the more real. At the same time, knowing what to expect at the hospital when I go into labor is hugely comforting.

Speaking of the hospital, I FINALLY got around to packing my suitcase for the hospital on Monday. Well, sort of. I got most of it packed up, but I'm still missing a couple of items here and there. I'm hoping that I can just pick them up on the weekend and be done with it more or less. As long as I don't go into labor before then, I should be just fine. Honestly, my biggest fear right now is going into labor and forgetting the cord blood collection kit that I picked up last week. I can't keep it with my suitcase right now because my bedroom gets really hot during the day and the lady with whom I spoke when I picked up the collection kit said to keep it in a cool place. So right now it's sitting in my basement, while my suitcase sits in my bedroom with a big post-it note reminding me to grab the collection kit. Once the other items have been packed, I'll take the suitcase down to the basement and re-unite it with the collection kit.

This week I also thought I'd figured out the timing for my mat-leave. The plan was to start it on July 26th so I'd still have 2 weeks until my due date to chill out. That plan is still in effect, but my manager's boss asked me today if I could work some half-days up until my due date. It's food for thought, and I may do the half-day thing after the 26th. It wouldn't be a big deal for me if I came in for the morning and just went home at noon or 1pm.

And finally, at long last, there is a light at the end of the tunnel for the kitchen renos! We got confirmation this week that our kitchen counter is getting put in on Monday, which means that the kitchen may actually be done by the end of next week. Yay!!! Whether or not that actually happens remains to be seen. Still, I'm glad that there's a date. I'll be even happier if the kitchen renos are done before PK arrives. Keep your fingers crossed!

Hospital Tour

2008-07-15T22:11:00.002-04:00

Yesterday we went on our hospital tour. I'm actually really really glad that we got around to doing it. Overall, I found it to be quite the surreal experience. Going to the maternity ward and getting a glimpse of what will happen when I go into labor was an eye-opening experience.

There were 3 other couples with us. Our tour guides were hospital volunteers. The first took us to the pre-natal (?) triage room. That's where they assess you for 4 hours when you first go into labor. I'm guessing that this is where they also turn you away if you're not far enough along in your labor. I really hope that I don't get turned away...otherwise, I'll be spending an awfully long time at the Starbucks downstairs. There's no way that I'd drive back home with the hospital being a 30-minute drive (on a good traffic day) from home.

Once you start going into active labor, you're taken to the labor room. The labor room looked a bit '90s ghetto. Considering that it was a hospital room, it could've been much worse. Cheesiness aside, the labor rooms are quite nice. They have the labor bed, some monitoring equipment, a private washroom with single-person Jacuzzi, a phone (no cell phones allowed), and some other equipment which was tastefully hidden away in what appeared to be hotel-like cabinets. That was a nice touch, because one of the things that the HypnoBirthing classes mentioned is how birthing nowadays is such "medical" process. This setup certainly made you feel less like you were in a hospital.

Another thing that I REALLY liked is that, while the bed we saw in the room looked like a regular flat bed, it converts into some crazy setup where you're practically squatting during labor. This is definitely a plus, as the squatting position is one of the most optimal birthing positions, since it opens up your pelvis nice and wide and shortens the birth passage. It also supposedly reduces/eliminates the need for an episiotomy (not that these are done that often anyway). BONUS!

I also found out that even though the hospital doesn't have birth balls anymore, they certainly allow them in the birthing rooms. That's good, since I picked up a birthing ball this weekend specifically to take to the hospital when I go into labor.

After the baby is delivered, you stay in the birthing room for about 2 hours, and then are taken to the "mom and baby" center - i.e. your accommodations for the remainder of your hospital stay. We were told that there are 6 private rooms, 14 semi-private rooms (2 beds to a room), and one room which houses 4 beds. Although I put down a private room as my first choice, it remains to be seen whether or not I will actually get one. I'm hoping for one, because spouses/birth companions are only allowed to stay overnight in the private room. Otherwise, it's buh-bye to the spouse at 10pm, since you need to be considerate of the privacy of the other new mom(s) in the room. That also means no telephone calls after 10pm. I find this thought a bit freaky. Odds are that I will most likely end up sharing a room with at least one other person, and the thought of being in there in this room with another person, and with my baby and no support from the hubby is positively FRIGHTENING!

The thought of spending my first night with PK alone made me extremely emotional, and I was on the verge of tears throughout the remainder of the tour. While taking the tour was a very positive experience, it suddenly made this parenting thing seem all the more real. It was a "holy crap, I'm really having this baby" moment. As if the squirmy little creature kicking at my bladder wasn't indication enough, eh? ;-)

The Best-Laid Plans...

2008-07-15T21:50:00.003-04:00

I should know by now that even the best-laid plans can be blown to smitherenes due to unaccounted for circumstances. I also should've learned a lesson from my first trimester - even I, a self-proclaimed Energizer Bunny, am at the mercy of my pregnant body and CAN (and WILL) get tired.

As with the first-trimester fatigue, the third-trimester fatigue has TOTALLY caught me off-guard. So much so that I had to take a "me day" last week to rest up.

When I first got pregnant, I had this "brilliant" idea that I could work through until I went into labor. I joked with my manager that my water would break while I was working away at my desk. I still find the thought rather amusing. :P Working up until the bitter end SEEMED like a good idea, especially since I was full of boundless energy in my second trimester and had trouble believing that the energy levels would drop once I got into my third trimester. Enter third trimester. An entirely different beast. Energy levels dropped. Staying awake during meetings was becoming increasingly more difficult. Walking around without huffing and puffing seemed like a distant memory.

That got me thinking that taking some time off before PK arrived wouldn't be such a bad idea. My days of sleeping in are very short-lived. As are my days of being selfish. I might as well enjoy what little time I have of life before PK, because after PK is born, life as I know it will cease to exist. Not for the worse, so I'm told, which is at least comforting. At any rate, I felt that I NEEDED to set a date for my mat-leave. So yesterday I told my boss that two weeks from that day would be my last day at work.

Yup, just tell me "I told you so".

Belly at 36 Weeks

2008-07-13T02:06:00.001-04:00

Here's the latest and greatest belly pic!

Those Damned Pesky Emotions

2008-07-11T14:03:00.002-04:00

My mom just sent me an e-mail forward about motherhood. I'll post the text at a later time because it's in Portuguese, so I still need to translate it. At any rate, it made me go all teary-eyed and it so happened that as I was reading this e-mail, a couple of people happened to come to my desk and saw me in tears. How embarrassing! I'm used to being so composed at the office, and this just makes me look so vulnerable and not in control.

It's those damned pregnancy hormones. That'll teach me to read mushy stuff during office hours.

Playing Hookey

2008-07-10T22:32:00.004-04:00

Today I decided to take a "me day". I figured that since I won't really be taking any time off before my mat-leave begins, it would be good to at least take a day to myself. Besides that, I've been a bit stressed and tired, and really really needed a day to clear my head. After all, if I want this HypnoBirthing thing to work, I really need to be calm and relaxed BEFORE as well as DURING labor.

Since the day was absolutely beautiful today (26C!) and my kitchen is still not done (translation: house looks like a war zone), I decided to spend the day with my mom. It was great. We ran a couple of baby-related errands in the morning, and then relaxed in the afternoon. Plus I got to mooch off of Mom's cooking. Can't beat that! Since my parents have a pool, I spent almost 3 hours in there. The feeling of weightlessness was just what I needed to relax and make me forget about the lack of mobility that I've been experiencing as PK gets bigger and bigger. If I could, I'd spend my entire day in the pool. Since that's not the case, I take what I can get. :)

Too bad it's back to reality tomorrow!

Week 35

2008-07-09T09:37:00.003-04:00

This week the fatigue is really hitting me - to the point where I find myself dragging my feet half the time. I think that I'll be taking a me day really soon. I seriously need a real vacation.

As I've mentioned in a previous post, I've started with the perineal massages. They are anything but pleasant, but there has been a noticeable difference in the amount that my perineum will now stretch. I really really hope that it makes a difference on L-Day. The perineum is stretched for 2-minute intervals, 3 times, and by the end of it, I feel absolutely sick. I don't quite know how to describe it other than the fact that it feels like mild nausea mixed in with fatigue. It definitely doesn't help with my energy levels.

This past weekend we picked up a few more odds and ends for PK's room. We bought some baby body wash and shampoo, some more fitted sheets for the crib mattress, and a vinyl mattress pad to put under the fitted sheets. Given that the mattress cost us a bloody fortune, we didn't want any PK bodily ick to soak through the mattress. I think at this point we're pretty set for PK's arrival.

Yesterday I was supposed to have had a make-up class for the HypnoBirthing class that the hubby and I missed a while back. Unfortunately, I was feeling really beat, especially after my doctor's appointment ran late. That, factored in with the fac that the make-up class location would be a bit more of a trek for us, I (we) decided not to go. It's just as well that we didn't show up, because the downtown core was hit with a really nasty thunderstorm that evening. It POURED for a couple of hours, and I was very very glad that I wasn't outside. I feel a bit guilty for missing the class, but to be honest, I think I've picked up all I can from that class. I've read the part in the book that was covered in the missed class, and now it's up to me.

I must admit that my confidence level re: HypnoBirthing has plunged significantly. A couple of weeks ago I had a very high-stress weekend (parental issues - long story), and I've been a bit on edge ever since. I feel that while my body can relax, my mind is unable to do so. As the time passes, I have been able to relax a bit more, but for some reason, my HypnoBirthing confidence is shot. I really don't know what to do, because I know that it's all a head game. Somehow I need to convince my brain that things will work out.

Yesterday I dropped off my forms for the cord blood banking place. It's going to cost us somewhere around $1,200 for initial setup and for the first year of refrigeration, but I figure that it's well worth the money for some peace of mind. This morning I picked up the collection kit, so now we're all set. I'm glad that this is out of the way - one more thing off of the to-do list! We just need to make sure that we take it to the hospital with us on L-Day.

So it looks like I'm more or less set for this labor thing. :) The only thing I need to do now is pack my suitcase for the hospital. I really should get around to doing it. We at least hauled the suitcase from our storage locker, and it is now sitting in my bedroom, as daily reminder that I am procrastinating. I think that part of me feels that the minute I pack the suitcase, I go into labor. It's a stupid silly thought, but I never claimed to be rational 100% of the time. :)

PK at 35 Weeks

2008-07-08T21:28:00.003-04:00

Today we went to see the doctor. From here on in, I'll be seeing him once a week. I hope that next week's appointment isn't like today's where we arrived on-time for our 3:30pm appointment, and ended up seeing him at 4:45pm. I'm just glad that I didn't book my appointment for first thing in the morning - the entire workday might have been a write-off!

In a nutshell, PK is doing just fine - still head-down. Not that I could tell from the ultrasound at this point. PK just looks like a big gray blob on the ultrasound these days, which I guess is to be expected. There's only so much that the little ultrasound probe can show at this point with PK being so big and all. I did ask him for a print-out of the ultrasound, however, and he provided me with one of PK's heart. I'm posting it up here, but I will warn you that you really can't tell that it's a heart on the picture.

I also got swabbed for Group B Strep (GBS). I'd done an initial GBS swab a few weeks back - when I was 25 weeks or so? I really can't remember. At any rate that swab came back positive. I'm not terribly optimistic about this one coming back negative, but if it DOES come back positive, I won't be distraught. These things happen. The good news is that there's treatment for it, so I'm not going to fret over it. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. :)

Torontonians Are Rude

2008-07-07T15:37:00.004-04:00

You've read my bitching on how I don't care that people don't offer me their seats on the subway and how I'm annoyed that people eagerly open doors for me. Well, I guess I've done a 180 of sorts, now that PK looks like a basketball attached to my abdomen. While I really don't give a snoot about whether or not someone opens doors for me, I am starting to care more about whether or not people offer me seats on the subway.

It's not so much that I don't have enough balance to stand as the subway jerks about, but I DO have another little person to think about. Swaying around with a big belly on a crowded subway car can be very disconcerting, and I worry about PK.

In a nutshell Torontonians are rude - couldn't you tell from the post title? :P On more than one occasion, I've been in a crowded subway car, with big belly and standing room only, and NOBODY has had the courtesy to offer me a seat. I have to stand and hold the rail and hope that I don't swivel back-and-forth as the subway jerks about. What's more is that as people crowd the subway, they are either oblivious to or ignore the fact that I'm pregnant and try to smush me like a pancake.

Today was no exception. The hubby and I got on the subway, and it was really really crowded. As I got in, I asked a woman near the door to move inward a bit so that I had room to get on. She ignored me. Stupid bitch. I ended up having to stand, with the hubby holding the rail with one hand, my backpack with the other hand, and me trying to take on a stable stance so that I wouldn't flail as the subway jerked about. I finally managed to find a seat at the next stop, though no thanks to the kindness of strangers.

On another occasion on the subway, there was an empty seat out of a set of two that were perpendicular to the window. There was a guy sitting on the outermost seat (by the aisle), and the empty seat was the innermost one (by the window). One would expect the normal, gentlemanly thing to do would be for the guy to move over to the window seat so that I could sit at the aisle seat. Unfortunately, as I said, Torontonians are rude. All he did was shift his legs over so that I could squeeze into the window seat. I may not have gained a ton of weight during pregnancy, but I still have a fairly protruding belly. I can't squeeze into spaces like I used to. I was so pissed off by this guy that I declined his "offer" and looked for a seat elsewhere. Stupid bastard.

Yes, I know...y'all told me so...

Perineal Massage

2008-07-07T09:19:00.002-04:00

I finally got around to doing that pesky perineal massage yesterday. I had been putting it off because the thought of sticking my fingers down there quite frankly is rather disturbing. What changed my mind, however, is when I read about episiotomies and tearing in The Mother of All Pregnancy Books this past weekend. BTW, this book came highly-recommended to me from my pre-natal classes, and I can see why. It's definitely a great read, and it's written by a Canadian! Yay!

Anyway, looking at all the ick associated with episiotomies made me realize that I should just suck it up and get this massage done. I should've started the routine at week 34, but better late than never.

BTW, if you think that this is a "fun" massage because of the parts of the anatomy involved, then think again. It's NOT fun. It hurts. It burns. You're stretching stuff that isn't used to being stretched. And this is just a preview of what it feels like when the baby's head is crowning. Yowsers!

The Birth Plan

2008-07-03T23:01:00.003-04:00

At long last, the hubby and I finally sat down this evening to put together a birth plan. Without further ado, here it is! My next challenge will be to present this to my OB on Monday. Wish me luck!

=====================

General Notes:

• Please consult with couple prior to executing any procedures/medical interventions

Laboring Environment:

• Labor at home for as long as possible
• Dim lights, quiet ambiance, and music in birthing room
• Spouse present at all times
• Have the option to labor in a tub or shower

Labor Choices:

• To begin labor naturally
• To be allowed to be up to two weeks past due date
• To wait for up to 24 hours for contractions to begin before discussing medical induction

NOTE: Unless there is a serious health risk involved in any of the above

Induction/Augmentation of Labor:

• Natural induction methods to be attempted before resorting to medical induction

Laboring Positions:

• To labor in the most comfortable position for me

Pain Relief Measures:

• I do not want epidural unless I ask for it
• I will be using Hypnobirthing techniques in lieu of medication for pain relief (i.e. relaxation techniques)

Delivery:

• No episiotomy unless asked for and agreed to by me

After the Birth:

• Cord blood banking
• Skin on skin contact with baby
• No unnecessary separation from baby. If separated from baby, my spouse will accompany
• Delay any standard procedures for as long as possible, to allow for bonding with baby

Caesarean Section:

• In the event that a C-section is needed, my spouse will be present during the procedure at all times
• Baby given to spouse to hold/bond

Barely Awake

2008-07-02T15:28:00.002-04:00

Today was one of those days where I had 3 hours' worth of meetings in the span of 4 hours, and I could barely stay awake. I hate the feeling I get partway through a meeting where I realize that I'm about to doze off, and there's nothing that I can do to stay awake. I tried breathing in deeply, rubbing my eyes, writing in my notebook, and even looking around the room to kill the monotony. None of these tactics worked. Oddly enough, I still managed to take (mostly) coherent notes.

I know that this is just third-trimester fatigue, but it does nothing to make me feel any better about feeling lethargic at work. I feel really guilty when I start dozing off in a meeting, because it just looks so bloody unprofessional! Plus it looks like I'm completely uninterested in the meeting, which is most often NOT the case.

I've noticed that I've been getting more and more tired with each passing day. I took naps on both Saturday and Sunday, and again on the Canada Day holiday. I don't usually take evening naps on workdays, probably because I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off up until bedtime. I'm sure that this will come back to haunt me. I really really really need to just take a day of nothingness...but I just can't bring myself to do it. I try to squeeze as much as I can into every day, and I STILL get frustrated that I can't finish everything in my mental to-do list. I'm the type of person who always needs to be doing something. It drives the hubby up the wall that I have urges to clean the house or tidy things up at odd hours. We've been late for a movie on more than one occasion because of my urge to tidy up just before heading out the door.

Maybe I just need a good swift nerf bat whack to the head to knock me out for a few hours so that I can actually get some rest. :)

Belly Pics

2008-07-01T23:24:00.002-04:00

It has been a while since I've posted some belly pics. Here are the latest and greatest for weeks 31 through 33.

Week 31

Week 32

Week 33

Week 34

2008-07-01T20:37:00.005-04:00

PK has been getting squirmier and squirmier with each passing week. Usually I don't mind that, except when she pounds on my bladder. These days, it feels like I'm peeing every two seconds. It doesn't help that my water intake has significantly increased because I'm always thirsty these days. Nowadays, I plan my walking routes such that I know that I have a washroom along the way should I need one. Salvation! Apart from that, I don't normally get any rib jabs, except when I'm slouching in bed. I've been a bit disappointed with my posture throughout this pregnancy. I really haven't been sitting up straight on my chair or even when I stand up. Fortunately, I seem to have been spared chronic lower-back pain. *knock on wood*

Speaking of ailments, the foot-swelling still continues, though I think it's more or less at bay now. The only weird that that I've noticed is that my feet have been extra-sweaty these days. I normally don't have sweaty hands and feet. In fact, my hands and feet are always COLD, no matter what season! Okay, maybe not so much in the summertime. These days, however, my feet are always warm. To the point where I have trouble wearing shoes with socks for very long because I just feel so damned uncomfortable. Another thing I've noticed is that my hands have tended to swell a bit, especially when the weather is warm. Today we went for a nice long walk to the lake, and by the end of it, my hands were swollen to the point that it felt like I'd just finished a nice long climbing session. There was no way that I'd be able to yank my rings off my fingers without some soapy water. I think it was a combination of the heat and the fact that I was walking, having my hands down by my sides most of the time. I don't normally get swollen hands when I'm at the office, since I'm always typing. I hope that this swelling isn't a sign of pre-eclampsia. I'm guessing it's not, since my urine tests, blood pressure readings, and weight gain haven't been cause for alarm, so it's probably just one of those things. At any rate, I'll ask my doctor at my next visit just in case.

Since PK's arrival is not too far away, we decided this past weekend that we should get our act together and take care of getting some PK-related odds and ends. Given that nobody got us any big-ticket items from our baby registry, we just went ahead and bought those ourselves. Here's a list of our weekend spoils:

A bathtub - With stand!
A diaper bag - We decided to go with a backpack, since I find those shoulder bags rather uncomfortable. Besides, I wanted something that the hubby wouldn't be embarrassed about carrying around if he were alone with PK. :D
A moulded change pad - It's made of a soft foamy-ish material kind of like what those wretched Crocs are made of
A baby carrier - We got the Baby Trekker, since we've heard pretty good reviews about it and crappy reviews about the Baby Bjorn carrier.
Bedding - We got this super-cute neutral-colored teddy bear-themed bedding. It cost us a bit too much though, since it was made of organic fibers.
Burp pads
A bottle sterilizer - We got the Born Free (BPA-free!) sterilizer to match our lovely set of Born Free glass bottles.

When we got home, we decided to wash the bulk of the baby clothes that we'd acquired to date, along with some bedding. We washed mostly onesies, toques, booties, burp pads, blankets, bedding, towels, and facecloths, and we still ended up doing two loads of laundry. I didn't bother with the larger clothes that we have for PK, since she won't be needing them quite so soon (they're for 6-months and onwards).

We also decided to clean up PK's room a bit. Ever since our baby shower, we've had boxes of things sitting off in the corner of the room. It was high time that we actually got around to setting things up. Major items of note: we have most of the bedding in place, and the hubby put together the bunny mobile that my mom had gotten us. It looks soooooooooo cute! :D

My next doctor's visit is next week, and since we're rapidly-approaching L-Day, the hubby and I have to get off our butts and come up with a birthplan...or at least tell our doctor that we want to have the baby au naturel. I really really hopes that he reacts in a supportive manner.

Speaking of L-Day, we finally booked a hospital tour, AND we found a pediatrician for PK. She's not located right downtown, but we can at least get to her by subway in about 15 minutes or so. She was referred to me by someone I met at a wedding who had a cute little four-month-old boy. It's nice to have someone's seal of approval like that. I was actually impressed by the fact that when the hubby called to see if she was taking new patients, she actually wanted to meet with us before PK was born to get to know us. I think that's so nice and so rare to see. We see her in a couple of weeks, so I'll likely write something up about that appointment.

Still on the to-do list is cord blood banking. It's a bit pricey, but better safe than sorry. We've done some reading on it, and it seems to be a worthwhile thing to do. My sister-in-law had it done, and we're most likely going with the same place that she went with her her little one. They charge about $1000 up-front, and then it's something like $100/yr to store the cord blood. Anything for a bit of peace of mind.

BTW, I'm still in denial about that pesky perineal massage. Okay...I'll start it at 35 weeks...I swear!

Bathtub

Crib with bunny mobile

Matleave Ponderings #3

2008-06-30T14:56:00.002-04:00

I've finally gotten around to filling out the various matleave forms for work. It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, though it was annoying to calculate the dates. Matleave seems to be split off into 2 - pregnancy leave, which is 17 weeks, and parental leave, which is 35 weeks. They add up to a grand total of 1 year.

I'm taking the full 17 weeks of pregnancy leave, and part of the 35 weeks of parental leave, which is why the calculations were so annoying. On top of that, I had to give estimates for:
- Last day to be worked (i.e. beginning of pregnancy leave)
- Last day to be paid
- First day of unpaid leave
- Start date of parental leave
- First day back at work (after parental leave)

I hate calendar calculations. Thanks goodness for MS Excel. :D

Although I technically have my mat-leave starting on August 1st, it's nothing more than an estimated date. In reality, I'll be working until the bitter end. I spoke with my manager and I *may* work a couple of days from home in the 2 weeks or so leading up to my due date, but I don't even know if I'll exercise that option. I think I'd be bored out of my mind working from home in an empty house. I'd rather be at work. Still, the option is there just in case.

I've also had to hash out the details of my part-time work arrangements. At first, I was thinking of working 1 day per week upon returning from maternity leave. After giving it some further thought, however, I decided to revise that plan, and have proposed working 2.5 days per week, or alternating working 2 days one week, and 3 days another week.

Why the change of plans, you ask? Well, let's be realistic. Working 1 day a week is not enough time to really get anything done at the office. On top of that, I don't think that my workplace would even be able to justify getting me a cubicle and computer, let alone approve such an arrangement. Besides, this way, I still get best of both worlds. Time spent with PK, and time to re-integrate into the workforce.

Of course, I have no idea what it'll REALLY be like once PK arrives, so for all I know, this plan may go to the dogs. Fortunately, work is pretty flexible about my changing my mind even while on mat-leave. I just hope that I can stick to the plan.

Week 33

2008-06-30T09:33:00.002-04:00

I had yet another doctor's appointment this week. Even though they're every 2 weeks now, I swear it feels like I'm there all the time. I don't mind so much, except for the fact that it takes me a friggin' hour to get there. Plus this one was earlier in the day (13:00h), so my entire afternoon of work was a write-off. He wanted to see me earlier in the day this time because he wanted to see me right after lunch, which apparently is a time when babies get squirmy in the womb. PK is squirmy ALL THE TIME, so it probably wouldn't have mattered so much. Anyway, the reason why he wanted PK to be extra-squirmy is because he wanted to check out my placenta. Apparently squirminess and placenta-measuring go hand-in-hand? At any rate, all was well on the placenta front, and PK is still favorably-positioned!

We even made it out of there at a good time! The only sucky thing is that when we left the doctor's office, we were greeted with a nasty thunderstorm (thunder, lightning, and pouring rain), so we had to wait out the storm for an hour or so before we could walk down to the subway station. By the time we got home, it was 4:30pm, and while I was tempted to call it a day, I VPNed into work and got about 3 hours of work done to make up for the lost time in the afternoon. Not that I'm complaining. I enjoy my work enough to WANT to work those 3 hours from home, so no biggie.

In other pregnancy news, my non-sciatica butt pains seem to be at bay now (maybe all that squatting practice and Yoga stuff I'm doing is finally sticking!), but it has been replaced by foot swelling. Most of the time it doesn't bug me, because my shoes aren't all that tight, but sometimes I do feel it. My legs are a bit swollen as well, mostly on my calves. I notice it most when I get up from my desk to walk, as they feel pretty stiff. Fortunately, I've got a box under my desk that I prop my feet on, so I think that it could be worse. One other thing that helps is time spent in the pool - both at aqua-fitness and mooching off of my parents' pool on weekends. :D

I've noticed a bit of hand swelling as well, especially when the weather is warm or when I walk a lot. It's not so bad during the day because my hands are elevated. It has been significantly better now that the weather has cooled off somewhat (i.e. 25C vs. 35C + humidity), though I notice that my left pinky (where my iron ring resides) still seems to suffer a bit.

The breathlessness that I was complaining about last time is still prevalent, though at this point, I've just accepted it. I'm still winded is hell whenever I go up a flight of stairs, though walking isn't so bad. The fatigue is definitely hitting me most during meetings, where, if I'm not actively participating, I just find myself feeling lethargic and wanting to doze off. Unfortunately, I think it'll only get worse before it gets better. Fortunately, since I DO actively participate in most meetings, I never quite fall asleep when the topic shifts away from my area of expertise/interest.

On the kitchen front, we are at a bit of a lull right now. Although our carpenter told us that the counters would be arriving 2 weeks after templating, our project manager said that it would be more like 4 weeks from the time of templating. While the 4 weeks is in line with the estimate that we were originally given, I really really was hoping that the counters would come sooner. That puts our counter ETA at around July 16th, and if all goes well (*knock on wood*), then they have another weeks' worth of work (hopefully less) to do odds and ends like install sinks, the toilet, and appliances. And after that, the hubby and I have the lovely task of cleaning cabinets, moving things back from our basement to the kitchen, and getting the house in order from its current state of chaos. For now, however, we are sitting ducks. Waiting sucks. I just hope that PK doesn't arrive before the kitchen is done.

And now, for the topic that I've been dreading for the last few weeks - the perineal massage. I think I'm at the point where I have to just take the plunge and do it, but I really really don't want to. First off, I hear that it hurts. Secondly, I really really don't want my fingers to be anywhere down there, thank-you very much. At the same time, the prospect of tearing during labor or being given an episiotomy (though the latter doesn't happen as much) do not tickle my fancy, so I guess I need to suck it up and just do it. Bleh.

Home Stretch Weight Gain

2008-06-26T10:52:00.002-04:00

I had a doctor's appointment this week, and as usual, I was weighed. I can't remember if I'd mentioned this before, but this doctor has one of those scales where you muck around with the little weights in order to figure out how much you weigh. By contrast, my old doctor just had a scale with the big needle. For the last few visits, I couldn't figure out how to read the scale at my current doctor's office, because the numbers just seemed really weird. This week, the nurse moved a big weight to the 40 mark, and a small weight to the 19 mark. And then it dawned on me: THIS IS A METRIC SCALE! Major DUH moment. :P

I won't go into too much of a rant over metric vs. imperial except that for an overall metric country, I HATE the fact that most people still refer to their height in feet and their weight in pounds. Pretty back-assed, if you ask me. Anyway, I guess I must've been somewhat brainwashed over the last few years, because now I always refer to my weight in pounds and my height in feet, so I always have to do the conversion to quote it the "right" (metric) way.

Anyway, I digress. So as of Monday, I finally "figured" out my current pregnancy weight (40kg + 19kg = 59kg). I guess I could've weighed myself at home, but I've refused to do so ever since I got pregnant. Don't ask why - it makes no sense. In the spirit of the metric system, I calculated my pre-pregnancy weight in kilos, and determined that so far, I've gained 11kg in the last 33 weeks. I decided to search around the Web to see if that weight gain was normal, and this is what I found on BabyCenter.ca. The first part of the article says that you're looking at gaining an average of 11kg by the end of your pregnancy when you add up things like baby, placenta, uterine growth, extra blood volume, and so on. At 33.5 weeks, I had already gained 11kg. Alarm bells went off in my mind. Now, before you feel the urge to smack me because of my weight gain complaints, read on. Then you may give me a virtual smack. :) As I was saying, I read further down the page, and realized that 11kg is merely an AVERAGE (makes sense), and that the amount of weight you should gain during pregnancy is based on your BMI. Being the keener that I am, I calculated my pre-pregnancy BMI to be approximately 18.75. According to the BabyCenter.ca article, it means that I should be gaining between 12.5kg and 18kg. The 18kg (~40lbs for you non-metric folks out there) upper-limit seems a bit excessive, and I'm guessing that that's reserved for women who were under-weight before getting pregnant. The moral of the story is that my 11kg (~24lb) gain over 33.5 weeks is normal enough, so I really should shut the hell up.

I really have no reason to worry. Most people have told me that I look pretty good for a pregnant gal, and that alone should have been reassuring. I guess I need the backing of numbers to re-assure me. I have to admit that freaked out a bit when I read a few weeks back that rapid weight gain occurs in the 3rd trimester and that, while that's normal, I don't want to go crazy and gain more than I need to by having sweets and all that. I live off of fruits and fruit juices. I tend to drink the no-sugar-added juices, but even "natural" fruit juices still HAVE naturally-occurring sugar. I would hate to be doing well throughout my pregnancy weight-wise, only to blow up in the home stretch.

I probably sound like a broken record today, since I've harped on the weight thing here and there throughout the life of this blog. The purpose of this blog, however, is to allow me to vent, so venting is what I've done. On that note, I promise to not mention the weight gain thing ever again on my blog for the duration of my pregnancy.

Putting Things into Perspective

2008-06-23T19:58:00.003-04:00

My family is probably not what you'd consider normal, but we're still close. My parents and sister live in Canada, while my ENTIRE extended family lives in Brazil. We've been in Canada for almost 20 years now, and while we visit the extended family as often as we can, I don't feel particularly close to anyone there, except my maternal grandmother. That's why my relationship with my family here is all that more important.

As L-Day looms (7 more weeks go go, give or take 2 weeks), the importance of family becomes all the more apparent. PK won't be just another addition to my little household. PK will be a daughter, a granddaughter, a great-granddaughter, and a cousin to the little extended family that we've built in Canada. Support from the extended family here will be all the more important.

Moments of crisis really make us realize that we can sometimes take the love and support of our family for granted. That's when you realize that the people you love really do love you - because they put up with your crap, and don't even think twice about it.

I truly hope, as every parent does, to have a good relationship with my child. I'm sure that my initial relationship with her will be more authoritative, as I need to give her the tools to live a successful life. As PK grows older, however, I will need to wean out of that authoritative role, in the hopes of moving into the role of friend, so that we can be equals, sharing ideas and opinions, even if our opinions sometimes clash. Easier said than done, I'm sure, but I can at least strive for it.

Ambushed!

2008-06-20T14:52:00.002-04:00

I was called into a meeting at 2pm today to discuss a work-relevant topic. About 5 minutes in, the meeting room door opened, and a bunch of other co-workers from my team streamed in with a cake and gift basket - a little surprise baby shower! I'm not used to so much attention, so my face went BRIGHT RED.

I can't even begin to say how touched I was by what my co-workers did. It certainly brightened my Friday. That they would actually put all this time into planning things - organizing a fake meeting, buying a cake, and buying a gift basket - certainly makes me feel like a valued member of the team. I don't think I've ever felt this way at any of my previous workplaces. WOW!

Errr...???

2008-06-19T16:51:00.004-04:00

A few weeks ago, we were at Shopper's to pick up some odds and ends. When we went to pay for our items, the lady at the check-out (who was Chinese) asked about my pregnancy:

Check-out Lady: So how far along are you?
Me: About 6 months.

Check-out Lady: That's so nice! Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?
Me: We're having a girl.

Check-out Lady: Oh, I guess you'll have to try again later then!
Me: [smile and nod]

I wasn't insulted because I know that it's a cultural thing, but it was still pretty surprising. You'd think that in this day and age, having a girl would be just as exciting for parents as having a boy. I guess every culture is different, isn't it?

Week 32

2008-06-19T16:41:00.002-04:00

I continue to be plagued by the usual 3rd-trimester fatigue, and the breathlessness is getting a bit worse. It's no cause for concern though; I see it as just another thing that I have to adjust to. It's interesting to realize that pregnancy (at least for me) is all about adaptation. The minute you come to grips/adapt to one of its little quirks, another one is thrown at you. Maybe it's done to keep me on my toes once PK comes along. A 2nd-time mom in one of my pre-natal fitness classes says that the adaptation goes well beyond pregnancy and into childcare too. I guess it's no surprise!

Now that HypnoBirthing is done, I've once again resumed going to my Tuesday aqua-fitness class. I don't know if it's the 3rd-trimester fatigue, but my Tuesday class was KILLER. I was totally pooped after it was done. It was just non-stop movement for the entire class. The same went for Yoga last night. Today I came to work completely sore. It's a good type of soreness - the type you get after an awesome workout - so no complaints! I can only wonder what's in store for today's aqua-fitness class!

And before I forget, a quick update on my kitchen! The cabinets were put up last week, so the room is finally starting to look like a kitchen again. The floors were put in this past Monday, and yesterday the appliances were delivered and the templating was done for the counter. If we're lucky (*knock on wood!*), then the counters will be delivered in 2 weeks, and in the meantime, they can finish up the minor carpentry that's still left. This should put us at a completion time of mid-July for the kitchen, which should hopefully give us time to actually get the house back in order before PK is born, and to have a kitchen-warming party. I'm a being too ambitious here? :P

Week 31

2008-06-19T16:19:00.004-04:00

The more I get into my 3rd trimester, the more I've noticed that my energy levels have declined. All things considered, I still feel pretty energetic; however, it's definitely not as high as my 2nd-trimester energy level, and certainly nowhere near my pre-pregnancy energy level. I was told by several new moms that energy drain during the 3rd trimester was common. I guess I thought I was immune to that, because I wasn't feeling in the earlier weeks of the trimester. That all changed around week 31, where I started feeling plain tired. The funny thing is that it's different from the fatigue that I felt in my first trimester. My first trimester felt like I'd been given NyQuil every day for 3 months. I felt as if I couldn't move my body, and I felt drained. The fatigue I feel in my 3rd trimester is totally different. It feels more like I haven't slept in days, and that I constantly need a nap. It's certainly a lot harder to stay awake during meetings, and as part of some cruel joke, it seems that I've got more meetings to attend now, than I did a few months back.

That being said, I'm being pretty stubborn about the whole thing, and try to carry on as if I didn't have diminished energy levels. I think one of these days I'll end up coming home on a Friday night and collapse on the couch until morning. :P It'll probably happen soon, and it'll probably be a good thing. It's probably the only way that I'll slow down!

Another thing which doesn't help with the fatigue is that I get out of breath really really easily. I guess little PK has gotten to the point where she's squishing my lungs. That's okay though - it means she's growing. :) The only sucky part about the whole thing is that by the time I get to bed at night, I'm totally panting. Plus my fitness classes seem to feel A LOT more intense, so I'm just dead after I finish.

Week 31 was also the last week of HypnoBirthing. Although I didn't have the most relaxing last session ever, it was still pretty fun. I'm sad that the classes are done now, because it was nice to have the instructors to talk to about various concerns and questions that we had. Fortunately they're really cool about staying in touch via e-mail, so that helps.

I guess another "highlight" of the week was my doctor's appointment on June 9th. It wasn't a terribly exciting appointment. As usual, I spent more time getting there than I did at the appointment itself, which at least means that everything was fine. He checked PK's position with the ultrasound machine, and PK was still in a favorable position (head-down), so I'm glad. I like to think that it's all due to the nightly stories that the hubby tells PK. He's getting pretty creative with these stories nowadays. They used to be about this and that, but now there's a theme - it's about a bunny and her daily adventures. Sometimes the stories are so elaborate that we have to stop and continue with the next part of the story the next day. It's very entertaining!

Yes, I Feel FINE!

2008-06-17T13:36:00.003-04:00

For whatever reason, when people at the office see me these days, they are inclined to ask me, "How do you feel?" I find the question puzzling. Am I supposed to be feeling bad? Are they waiting for the day when I waddle into the office? Are they waiting for the day when I can't get out of my chair because of my growing belly? Or maybe I'm just reading into this too much and just wanted a topic to blog about. :P

What I do know is this: I FEEL FINE! I'm still exercising regularly, and while my energy levels have dropped a bit and am out of breath more often than not, I still feel like I have more energy than most - certainly more energy than the hubby has. I think he was a bear in a past life due to his love of sleep. :)

Not Feeling the Love

2008-06-16T13:26:00.002-04:00

The closer I get to my due date, I can't help but wonder if I should've done things differently. In the beginning, even though I was really excited about the pregnancy, I was also pretty upset by it for making me feel so crappy all the time and for changing my body so much. Should I have done things differently? Should I have complained less or been less crabby about it?

I was so afraid of miscarrying, that I detached myself completely from the pregnancy. The stats are CRAZY. There's a 20-30% chance of miscarrying before a heartbeat is detected. After that, it drops down to 5%. When we told our parents partway into my first trimester that I was pregnant, I told them not to get too excited and to not get too crazy with buying baby things just yet.

I'm probably less detached now, especially after I started feeling PK moving. That put the pregnancy into a whole new perspective for me. It was the "Holy crap! There's a human being growing inside me!" moment of realization. At the same time, I feel as if I don't have that connection to PK that I see others having with their unborn babies. I don't talk to her. I don't rub my belly. I don't usually play music around her - I seriously keep forgetting to do that now that band practice is done for the summer. The hubby does all the talking and belly rubbing. And he likes to sing her some songs that we made up early on when we were dating (they're totally silly but could totally be put into a kiddie album - there's my lost calling!). As for me, I just poke my belly sometimes when she doesn't move for a while to make sure she's okay. When when she starts moving again, sometimes I'll say "Welcome back!" to her, and that's about it.

Will I be this detached when PK is born, or will the gush of unconditional love flow freely into me like a burst dam as soon as she makes her world début? Will I know how to hold her and calm her down if she's feeling distressed, hungry, or poopy? I really can't see myself doing that, but they say that the maternal instinct does kick in.

Hell, I have trouble taking care of myself sometimes. I'm 28 but I still feel like a kid some days. I still call my mom crying if I've got a problem or need advice. I seek parental approval all the time. I feel as if half the things I do revolve around getting an approving nod or comment from my parents. I need them to tell me that they're proud of me, and that I've done well for myself.

And now I'm supposed to do that for my own kid??? I'm just hoping that the Maternal Instinct Switch flicks on when it's supposed to...

Don't Mess with my Chi

2008-06-11T09:19:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was a bit of a frustrating day. After waking up with such a lovely HypnoBirthing dream, it seems that my feeling of serenity went the way of the Dodo. It's not that my workday was bad or anything. It was fine, actually. It's when we got to our HypnoBirthing class yesterday that it all fell apart.

It started off well enough. Last class, we were assigned a "Fear Release" exercise, where each couple wrote down some of their fears related to birthing and parenting, and then discussed it afterwards. We had done our homework the night before and had a great talk resulting from our fear points. It was quite liberating actually. During yesterday's class, we went around the room and briefly discussed the exercise, with each couple talking about its top fear. They included:

1. Interference from the in-laws and how to tell them to buzz off nicely :P
2. Financials
3. Work life after baby

After our brief discussion, we were taken through a relaxation exercise to release our fears. I was all excited because usually the relaxation exercises leave me quite serene. I leaned back on my chair, and as Natasha (one of our instructors) read out the relaxation script, it began.

First, my thought was, "Crap, my back hurts. This is so uncomfortable. Should I shift? Nah...this will last a bit longer. I can hang on." Then, my left leg started bugging me. I don't know quite how to describe it other than a weird shooting pain down my leg - kind of like when people get those pains that indicate that the weather is about to change. I told myself, "It's okay. You're being tested. Just remain calm. Wish the pain away." But I couldn't. And so I stiffened up my leg. And this caused a similar pain on my arm. And next thing I knew, my shoulders were tense, and then my neck. I started shifting in my chair, and furrowing my brow.

By the end of it, I couldn't wait for the relaxation exercise to end, because I felt that once it ended, I could at least be more at ease in my seat. Talk about counter-productive! The funny thing is that I was able to visualize most of the things that Natasha was talking about in her script. I still went through the fear-release steps in my mind, but I wasn't relaxed, and I fidgeted the whole time.

That little episode freaked me out. What if I can't remain calm when I'm in labor? What if I start getting this annoying shooting pain? I've had this shooting pain before, when we went to see a movie a few weeks back. I spent the entire 2 hours writing in my chair, stiffening my limbs. Shifting here and shifting there. It was excruciating!

Class ended late because it was our last class *snif* (though we have a make-up scheduled for that one class we missed a couple of weeks back). We didn't get home until 10:30pm, and I was pooped by then. A nasty thunderstorm the night before had kept me awake and I felt like I hadn't slept in days.

In spite of all this, the HypnoBirthing classes have been pretty empowering. Besides realizing that having a drug-free birth not only is good for me, I also know that it's good for the baby. Plus I know what to expect when it comes to L-Day (Labor Day :P). I know that I can tell them that I don't want doctors/nurses to break my water for me, and that I can decline an episiotomy, and that I can tell them to bugger off if they tell me to birth lying down. (Did you know there are TONS of birthing positions???)

The only thing that sucks is when I tell people about HypnoBirthing, and they roll their eyes at me, like I'm some new-age psycho or have been brainwashed by a cult. I hate defending my decision to go with HypnoBirthing. I'm not crazy. It's not part of a cult. Sure, it's not mainstream, and that's probably what gets people. We've been going along with birthing in hospitals with drugs and being seen as potential C-section candidates because that's the status quo. But just because something is the status quo doesn't mean that it's necessarily right.

People used to believe that the Earth was the center of the Universe. That was the status quo and people went along with it. Today, we know better, because science has taught us otherwise. Maybe someday HypnoBirthing and other birthing methods like it will become more mainstream and people will learn to embrace it. I guess until that happens, we have to deal with the fact that in the Medical Universe, the Earth is still flat and is still the center of the Universe.

Strange Dreams

2008-06-09T09:24:00.003-04:00

I had the strangest, yet most comforting dream last night. I dreamt that I was in labor. I've had dreams like that before throughout this pregnancy, but this one was a bit different.

A few days ago, for example, I dreamt that I was in labor and that I wasn't at all prepared to go through with it. I kept fumbling through my HypnoBirthing exercises, and was distraught to realize that I'd forgotten my CD of birthing music. The dream ended before the baby was born, which is just as well, because that particular dream had left me a bit frazzled.

In last night's dream, I was in labor again. This time, however, I was applying the HypnoBirthing techniques, so the entire labor was easy and pain-free. The hospital staff were quite supportive about my decision to go the HypnoBirthing route, and let me do my thing. The baby came out in no time, but here's the kicker: when she came out, she was fully-clothed (yellow shirt and denim overalls) and looked like a 2-year-old, even though she was the size of a newborn. Her hair was brown and straight and short, and she had bangs. The other funny thing is that in my dream, she was born in June, which would make her 2 months pre-mature, but that didn't seem to bother me at all.

I'm not at all disturbed by this dream, in spite of the fact that PK was born pre-mature in it. Rather, I am filled with a calming feeling. Maybe it's because I've been really focusing on my HypnoBirthing relaxation techniques over the last few days, determined to show all those non-believers that it IS possible to have a relaxing, pain-reduced (if not pain-free) birth au naturel. These relaxation sessions have certainly changed my overall demeanor lately, and putting me in a surprisingly good mood. (The warmer weather and sunshine help too!) I'm just hoping this more relaxed, less apprehensive (I said less apprehensive, not un-apprehensive :P) of me continues to exist long after PK is born. :)

HypnoBirthing in Review

2008-06-05T23:11:00.005-04:00

I'm really glad that I'm taking the HypnoBirthing classes, and even happier that the hubby has totally gotten into it. Although I totally dragged him into this, he comes into the classes with a very cheery disposition and is always ready to participate. That's my boy!

The classes are great because they're so much more than just the breathing and meditation. They're also all about birthing prep. It has been quite the stark contrast to the Journey Into Childbirth class that the hubby and I took back in March or April (can't remember which). That class was useful but it was more centered around childbirth being more of a medical thing. Granted, it was refreshing to know what to expect from an epidural (should I ever need one - don't want to think about that). At the same time, it's equally-refreshing to hear that women CAN give birth without epidurals and that I'm not crazy for wanting a natural birth.

While I'm sold on HypnoBirthing, however, I am still pretty apprehensive about the day I give birth. First off, I don't know how my doctor will react to it. Part of me thinks that he'll mock me. The hubby and I still need to work out a birth plan so that we can discuss it with him and let him know that we want a natural birth.

Secondly, I hear that the nurses attending the births can be on the bitchy side and can get pretty darn bossy when it comes to showtime. One girl in my class said just today that she wanted to try a different birthing position (other than the standard lie-on-your-back position), and that the nurse gave her some lipservice over it. I heard of another girl who wasn't allowed to use her the breathing techniques that she'd practiced, having been told by the nurse that she was "getting in the way". I'm sure that not all nurses are like that, but it's good to be aware that some nurses ARE.

The other part of my anxiety stems from the fact that I don't know if the hubby and I can handle all this HypnoBirthing stuff on our own when it comes to showtime. Part of me would feel really comfortable having a doula around (I NEVER thought I'd ever hear myself say that), because she could tell off the hospital staff if they gave us trouble, and could walk me through my breathing exercises without me wanting to tell her off. I could totally see myself telling the hubby to go fly a kite during labor if he were to try to calm me down. The hubby could probably tell off the hospital staff if he needed to, but would he cave if a nurse or doctor said that my membrane needed to be ruptured at a certain point even if it wasn't life-threatening? Or could he tell the nurse to bugger off if she (or he) keeps trying to offer me drugs?

Fortunately, we still have some time to work this stuff out! Stay tuned!

Week 30

2008-06-05T22:38:00.004-04:00

I suppose that I could classify this week as semi-eventful. I had my baby shower last Saturday, which was quite fun. We had a great turn-out of work friends from one of my old jobs, university friends, high school friends, and even junior high friends. We got together at Jack Astor's in downtown Toronto and had a blast. The only problem with such a large group (I think that there were 20 of us!) is that it's hard to talk to everyone. So I spent part of my time chit-chatting with clusters of people to make sure I got to chat with everyone. My apologies if I didn't get to talk to you. :(

Earlier that day, we had a little gathering at my parents' place. My sis was in town for the weekend, taking time off from her busy med school schedule. She'd organized the shower, and did a fantastic job. Anyway, we also got together at my parents' place for lunch earlier that day, and she bought me a really nice cake - VERY yummy too! The writing that she chose to put on the cake was so great that I just HAD to post it here! See photos below.

Kitchen renos are still ongoing. At least now they're done tearing stuff up and have actually started putting things in (e.g. drywall). Hopefully we'll have some semblance of a kitchen in the next week or so. Keep your fingers crossed!

This week we managed to make it to the HypnoBirthing class. We're still making arrangements to do a make-up class with the instructors, but they've been more than willing to accommodate us, so there should be no problem.

Now, for the Stupid Injury of the Week. On late Tuesday afternoon, my ribs on my left side near my back started hurting. I thought nothing of it because I had just gotten over my springtime allergies (yes, FINALLY!), and my ribcage is always a bit sore from the crazy coughing fits. No biggie. THEN, later that night, I sneezed. I have NEVER felt such excruciating pain in my life. Seriously, I kid you not. It was so bad that I screamed. It scared the crap out of the hubby, poor thing. My side was hurting for a good few minutes, and now I'm in constant pain. The pain is not as bad as the post-sneeze pain, but it's still annoying. Turning in any way hurts, as does lying down. Plus, I sneezed a couple of times since then, which causes that excruciating pain to return. I really really hope that it's *only* a bruised ribcage and that nothing is broken. I don't see why or how I could've possibly broken my ribs, but if my ribs end up being broken, it will go down as one of the world's DUMBEST injuries. I'm seeing my OB on Monday, so I'll mention it to him. I'm sure he'll end up telling me to see my family doctor.

My belly at 30 weeks.

PK on the Way Cake!

Stir-Crazy

2008-05-29T13:57:00.003-04:00

I'm finding it harder and harder to concentrate at work these days if I spend a long period of time sitting at my desk. I'm seriously getting stir-crazy. The aches and pains and all that wonderful ick associated to 3rd trimester are sure hitting me. Today my lower back is hurting. My spine overall feels really stiff. I'm shifting in my chair every five minutes (or less). I lean this way and that way, and I'm sure that that's contributing to my aches. My posture has never been great, and lately, it has been worse. I just feel UNCOMFORTABLE! Top that with the fact that I'm trying to pump out a technical design document complete with inspiring (HA!) technical writing and pretty Visio diagrams makes me want to get up and leave, and enjoy that nice 22C weather outside.

On the bright side, *only* 10 more weeks to go! (give or take)

Week 29

2008-05-28T11:22:00.001-04:00

This past week has been quite exciting. First, our baby furniture was delivered last Saturday. I'm really pleased with the way that the nursery looks, and I totally loooooooooooove my new glider. I did one of the HypnoBirthing relaxation exercises on the glider the other day, and it felt like I was floating on air when I had my eyes closed. Very nice!

Our kitchen renos started on Monday, which means that the bottom half of our house looks like a war zone. We moved all of our kitchen stuff down to the basement (pots, pans, non-perishables, plates, glass, cutlery, and alcohol) last Saturday and Sunday. The hubby wouldn't let me carry any of the heavy stuff, which is just as well, because I was huffing and puffing from carrying the little wee things down to the basement. Our cabinets have been pulled out, along with our old backsplash. All that remain are the fridge and stove, which I managed to donate to a friend, though we're keeping the fridge around just a bit longer until the new fridge arrives, so we can actually eat real food once in a while.

I had my second doctor's appointment with the new doctor on Monday. It took us longer to get there than the amount of time that we actually spent in there seeing him, but that's to be expected. He DID tell us that subsequent appointments would be pretty quick, so I'm neither surprised nor disappointed. We saw PK in an ultrasound again (I guess he uses that in lieu of a Doppler) - see the baby AND hear it - and it now looks like PK is no longer in breech. I am not holding my breath just yet, since babies do tend to move at the last-minute, but it does fill me with hope. The different anti-breech (for lack of a better term) positions that I learned in my pre-natal classes, along with the hubby's gentle coaxing to PK to "Just do a little hand-stand" seemed to have worked. We've also added a PK Bed-Time Story into our daily routine, whereby the hubby tells PK a bed-time story every night. He has VERY EAGERLY accepted his mission as storyteller, which makes me happy. :) He's far more imaginative than I am, plus I really enjoy watching him as he lies down next to my lower abdomen to tell stories. It's really really cute!

Although the weather has been nicer in recent days (we hit 27C on Monday!), it has been cold-ish (high of 15C or 16C on most days). Normally, I wouldn't care so much, EXCEPT that I have been wearing pants rather than skirts on most days, and I'm starting to wonder just how long the Bella Band will last me. I really really don't want to cave and buy maternity pants because we're so close to summer! As long as my butt doesn't decide to undergo a growth spurt, I should be fine. *knock on wood!*

The only damper to the week was this whole measles scare, but I'm glad that was resolved.

Next up is my baby shower on Saturday, organized by my dear younger sister. I'm not into the frilly girly-girl baby showers, so we're keeping unconventional. Guys and girls allowed, and no stupid baby shower games. We're getting together with all of our closest friends at a restaurant on Saturday night, and then whoever wants to tag along can join us to see the new "Indiana Jones" flick. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law wanted to organize one for me and I dashed their hopes and dreams when I said that it was for family only, co-ed, and no baby shower games. It's just not me...seriously. They went along with the plan until I canned that idea after we were having trouble making everyone's schedules work, especially for out-of-town family (on the hubby's side). We may still do something smaller with just parents, siblings + spouses, and the hubby's grandmother. I have a feeling that my mom would be really really disappointed if I didn't have anything on the family side, so that'll probably happen at some point. Plus I know that the hubby was looking forward to it too.

Measles Update

2008-05-28T09:05:00.002-04:00

After the hubby called me yesterday with the news of the guy in his office who potentially had the measles it was hard to concentrate. Did the guy at the office have the measles? Was the hubby immunized? Would I really be okay if I came into contact with somebody who had the measles? Would/should we be attending our HypnoBirthing class that evening?

By the time we'd left work yesterday, we still hadn't heard back from either the hubby's parents re: his immunization records or from his office re: the co-worker's medical status. He was COMPLETELY freaked out when I met up with him after work because a co-worker had sent him a measles fact sheet saying that an un-immunized pregnant woman could run the risk of premature labor or miscarriage. Oddly enough, I was the calm one. The poor guy looked like he'd seen a ghost, so I guess my reaction was to try to comfort him as he totally flipped out. I re-iterated the fact that I called the doctor's office and MotherRisk that afternoon, and that they said that the baby would be fine.

We got a hold of his parents just as we were eating dinner at Tim Horton's (the result of our kitchen having been gutted a day earlier). Unfortunately, it turns out that while he'd had the first measles vaccine, he'd never had the booster. According to Toronto Public Health, you're not considered a carrier as long as you've had your booster. I checked my records once we'd gotten home and found out that I've been immunized for the measles a whopping FOUR TIMES, so I would not be considered a carrier. The hubby, on the other hand, would be considered a carrier if office guy DID have the measles, so we thought it best to not attend the HypnoBirthing class that evening.

We were obviously bummed out, but it was the right thing to do. Besides, we hadn't heard back from his office re: the status of that co-worker, so we thought we'd be better safe than sorry. At any rate, since the disease apparently spreading like wildfire in downtown Toronto (probably parents getting it from their un-immunized kids attending daycare downtown), he is making arrangements to get that booster shot ASAP so that we don't have to go through this crap again.

At around 10:30pm, the hubby finally got word from his office that his co-worker DID NOT have the measles. Whew! Of course my first reaction was "Damn it, we could've gone to the HypnoBirthing class!", but I knew deep down inside that we'd done the right thing because:

Even if the mothers had been immunized and their babies would be safe, the fathers could get sick. And it's not like the measles is a fun illness to have.
If any of the mothers had not been immunized and something happened to one of the babies, we would NEVER forgive ourselves for it.
We would expect someone in the same situation to extend us the same courtesy.

Lesson learned.

And parents, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE VACCINATE YOUR KIDS ALREADY!!!

Measles: Near-Scare?

2008-05-27T14:38:00.003-04:00

The hubby just called me at work to tell me that someone in his office just went to the ER under the suspicion that he or she has measles. I guess the Powers That Be at the office didn't want to name names to protect that individual from being smacked for his or her irresponsibility.

Of course, being 29 weeks pregnant, I flipped out. There's a measles outbreak in Toronto at the moment, and the main reason is that PARENTS DON'T HAVE THEIR KIDS VACCINATED!!! That totally pisses me off because it puts the general population at risk. Parents are weary of vaccinating their kids now because they think that vaccines are linked to autism. Newsflash: autism becomes apparent at around the same time as kids are of age to start getting vaccinated. There's no medical evidence linking the two!

I know that I've had my MMR (Measles-Mumps-Rubella) vaccine, but that was done over 10 years ago. Am I immune if the hubby gets sick? Did he ever get the MMR vaccine? Right now he's trying to get a hold of his mom to ask - we're still waiting to find out...

Anyway, I decided to call my doctor to be on the safe side. I was told that I *should* be okay, but suggested that I call MotherRisk just to be on the safe side. The lady at MotherRisk said that unlike Rubella (German Measles), if the mother gets sick with the measles, the baby is UNHARMED. That's at least a relief. Rubella, on the other hand, is another beast altogether. If the mother contracts Rubella, the baby can end up being born with birth defects. I know I'm fine for Rubella (I had a blood test to check up on my immunity to that before I got pregnant), so that's at least a relief. But that's neither here nor there - measles are the cause for concern right now, not Rubella.

The lady at MotherRisk also said that I should *technically* be immune to the measles because I got my MMR vaccine, but these things are never 100%. I still got sick with the whooping cough when I was 8 even though I had my DPT vaccine, so I am very painfully aware of the fact that she's right.

Still, I find this whole situation annoying. It's a total waiting game for us, and what a big pile of pooh this is. We have our HypnoBirthing class tonight, and we don't even know if we should show up...GAH!!!

PK's Room - Update

2008-05-25T00:34:00.003-04:00

Our baby furniture finally arrived on Saturday morning. We were told that the delivery window was between 9am and noon, so we woke up early just in case the delivery guys showed up right at 9am. Since we were up and ready by 9am, the Laws of Nature dictate that as a result, the movers would show up towards the end of the delivery window - which they did.

They ended up arriving a bit after 11am. They didn't leave until around 1pm or so. Why? Because we had a buttload of furniture (crib, glider, ottoman, and 2 dressers), AND our house is clearly NOT designed to actually have furniture moved into it. Our house is a split-level type of place where every room is on its own floor, and it alternates between a half staircase and a full staircase as you move up the house. Anyway, the movers had a hell of a time getting the furniture up our windy stairs, and it didn't help that the furniture was ridiculously heavy.

When all was said and done, we ended up with one little wall gouge just outside of PK's room. Not bad considering that we have evil evil stairs. Overall, we were very pleased with their service, and the delivery guys were surprisingly patient through the entire ordeal.

After the delivery guys left, we had the fun of moving the furniture around. Fortunately for us, they put the crib together, so we didn't have to worry about that. Yay! We must've spent an hour or so moving the furniture around the room to get the optimal configuration. When I say "we", I really mean that the hubby moved furniture around as I directed. He's all protective of me now that I'm at 29 weeks, and didn't even like me moving the glider around the room. The glider had felt feet on it, so it's not like I was lifting the darn thing. :P

Anyway, enough yapping from me. Without further ado, here are the pictures of PK's room! Enjoy!

All Walks of Life

2008-05-23T23:42:00.000-04:00

Everyone in my pre-natal exercise classes has a "story". We may all be pregnant at the same time, but path we took to get to this point and the paths we'll take thereafter are vastly different. It's interesting to see such diversity.

There are lawyers, teachers, engineers (including Yours Truly), and doctors. There are gals who got pregnant shortly after getting married, and others who got pregnant shortly before getting married. Some aren't married at all, but are in committed relationships. Some have an OB, and some have a mid-wife. Some have opted for some added support by hiring a doula. Some want the epidural and some want a natural birth, hoping to somehow bear through the pain when the times comes for the kid to pop out. Some will be surrounded by family after their babies are born, and some are a long way from home and have to brave it by themselves.

One girl was telling me that she's going to have her baby back home in Halifax, where her parents and her in-laws live, because they can (and are willing to) help her out. Her husband is a corporate lawyer and therefore spends most of his time working. She doesn't even know if he'll be at the birth, because he has X days off, and the time he's taking off is based on that farcical 40-weeks-of-pregnancy mark that doctors like to give as due dates.

Another girl's partner is working in the US. Meanwhile, she's stuck in Toronto trying to sell their condo so that she can join him in the States later. She won't be joining him until after the baby is born, because she will be staying with her parents at their cottage for the entire summer, to have and raise the baby during its first few months of life.

Look at me, even. I got married at 23, and am having a kid at 28. By the time PK pops out, I will have been married for 5 whole years. By today's standards, that's an awfully long time to be married sans kids. Not to mention the fact that I got married at a relatively young age by today's standards. Most people probably just assume that we had trouble conceiving. The truth of the matter is, we weren't ready to be parents when we got married (even though the hubby is 5 years my senior), so there was no rush for us.

It just goes to show that there is no such thing as a "typical" pregnancy. We're all different, and that's just fine by me. Can you imagine how boring the world would be if every birth were the same?

Belly at 29 Weeks

2008-05-23T22:48:00.004-04:00

As promised, I finally got around to taking a more recent picture of my belly. Here at is, in all its glory, at 29 weeks! Oddly enough, this picture makes my belly appear a bit smaller than the one I took at 24 weeks...but I swear that my belly is growing! The difficulty I have tying my shoes should be proof enough!!!

The Glucose Tolerance Test

2008-05-22T23:06:00.002-04:00

As I'd mentioned in my last post, the results from my glucose challenge test weren't so favorable, so I had to go for the 3-hour glucose tolerance test.

This test had to be scheduled, and I scheduled mine for this past Wednesday. Since this test requires fasting for ~12 hours, I stopped eating at 6:30pm the night before. My appointment was for 8am the next morning. When I got to the lab, there was a HUGE lineup - and the lab wasn't even open! Interestingly enough, most of the people in line were senior citizens. I guess they wanted to get their tests over and done with as quickly as possible. Why they would opt to wake up so early for blood tests and whatnot is beyond me, especially since I gathered that most of them were retired. Maybe they were fasting too. Anyway, I digress.

By the time I got started with everything, it was 8:45am. They made me give a urine sample first, and then they drew some blood (right arm) before I drank the orange drink. They gave me the drink soon afterward, which was a relief to me, because I was already starting to feel faint. Rather than feel better after consuming that drink, however, I felt worse. I guess not eating since 6:30pm the previous night didn't help. And now the waiting began. After downing the drink, I had to have my blood drawn once every hour, for 3 hours. This brought the grand total of needles poking my arms to 4. OUCH!

I found it a bit difficult to get comfortable. It didn't help that I had my backpack on me, complete with my Yoga mat (Wednesday is Yoga night), making my backpack extra-heavy. All of the technicians seemed pretty horrified that I was lugging this thing around at 6 months pregnant.

I brought 2 books with me to pass the time. One was The Omnivore's Dilemma, which, by the way, is an excellent read, though you'll probably never look at food the same way again. The other book was the HypnoBirthing book, which I got as part of the HypnoBirthing classes that we started taking. I hadn't opened the HypnoBirthing book yet, so I decided to read that. It was a great read, but waking up early that day plus fasting started getting to me, and within 30 minutes, I fell asleep. I woke up in time for the 2nd drawing of blood (left arm).

The second hour was not so painful. I was well-rested and got some good reading done. The HypnoBirthing book is a fascinating read, and really helped to calm me down. That morning, when I woke up, I had a bit of a "What the hell am I doing having a baby?" moment. I guess I'd been so busy with classes and work lately that I didn't even really have time to freak out. That morning, however, something got to me. Maybe as I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my big belly sticking out at me, realizing that life as I know it now would be over in 3 months or so. That, coupled with the fact that I have NO IDEA on what to expect as far as parenting goes just made me feel really uneasy all of a sudden. I'd told the hubby about my little freak-out morning, and he managed to calm me down somewhat. The HypnoBirthing book, however, helped calm me down further. Any bit of anxiety that was still lingering from that morning was gone. It put me in a good headspace and made me realize that having PK around will be an exciting time, even if it will be challenging at times. Right now, though, I needed to focus on having a successful pregnancy and labor.

After the 2nd hour was over, it was time to draw more blood (right arm again). The third hour went by really quickly. The blood lab was ridiculously busy the entire time I was there. I'm glad I found a seat after each time I had blood drawn, because I was tired and felt light-headed. Finally, the 3rd hour was done, and blood was drawn one last time. The vein on my left arm was pretty swollen, so the lab tech had to poke my right arm a 3rd time. If you'd looked at my arms that day, I'd probably look like a drug addict. Oy...

Now I sit and wait. My next doctor's appointment is on Monday. My test results were supposedly in sometime today and I haven't gotten any calls from the doctor's office. I don't know if it's because they'll wait to let me know about the test results on Monday, or if there's nothing wrong with me. Hopefully it will be the latter. Stay tuned!

Week 28

2008-05-22T22:17:00.003-04:00

Although I look more pregnant this week, I'm always surprised by how many people look at me and say that I look small for being 6 months pregnant. I guess one of these days I should post an updated photo so you can judge for yourself. I'm still not experiencing any issues with balance that I hear so many pregnant women complain about.

I am, however, starting to experience swollen feet. At least I think they're swollen. I bought a pair of slip-ons about 2 months ago or so, and they were a bit large on me when I first bought them, and now they fit pretty snugly. I'm guessing that it's due to swelling. As long as my feet don't swell so much that I can't fit into my shoes, I'm totally okay with it. Another thing that's new to me is a tightness that I feel on my calves. I actually think that they're swelling too. I find that sometimes after I sit for a while, they feel rather stiff, and I have to shake them out.

Another wonderful side-effect of 3rd trimester is that I find that my arms seem to fall asleep a lot more easily than they did before. I get that pesky pins and needles sensation that requires a bit of shaking to get rid of.

I swear that throughout my entire pregnancy, just when I've adapted to one thing, some new sensation/ailment comes along which takes me by surprise and requires me to adapt once again. I guess that's the way it rolls. As long as the surprise isn't too huge, I can live with it.

Speaking of surprises, I was in for a big one last week, when I went to see my new OB. After the epicly-long appointment with my new OB last week, the hubby and I decided to hit McDonald's for milkshakes. I've pretty much sworn off McDonald's except for ice-cream, and breakfast. We always hit McDonald's for breakfast on ultrasound day because there's one right beside the lab where I get my early-morning ultrasounds done (granted, I feel guilty every time I go there for breakfast). Anyway, I digress. So we'd just gotten our milkshakes from McDonald's and started walking back towards the subway station, when I get a call from the OB's office. Apparently my glucos challenge test results had come in, and I was JUST above the cut-off. The cut-off for that test is 7.8, and my results came in at 8.1. This meant that they wanted to schedule me for the 3-hour glucose tolerance test. Ugh. I don't mind drinking the sugary Orange Fanta drink, but sitting in a lab for 3 hours is not my idea of fun. Ugh.

Other than the glucose test, I went on yet another maternity clothes shopping trip. I've pretty much decided that I won't be buying any more long-sleeve shirts for the rest of the season, in spite of the fact that it has been rather cold in Toronto lately. Summer clothes, however, are still on the table. I'd like to think that the weather will warm up relatively soon, and therefore I would like to have a decent summer wardrobe.

Although I love the stuff at Rhonda Maternity, it IS on the expensive side. So I decided to go to Thyme Maternity. They've got decent selection AND I had a $50 discount card that I got with my last purchase there. Bonus! I ended up buying more items than I'd planned on buying, but I'm betting on the fact that I will get more wear out of these clothes.

The only thing that totally bugs me about Thyme Maternity is when I go to pay for my clothes. First, they try to make me fill out some ballot for free baby stuff. I don't need some crappy package of baby products that I will probably not even use - especially since we're going for the enviro-friendly Seventh-Generation products that we can get at Whole Foods and Grassroots. After passing that hurdle, I am always asked whether or not I want to be put on their list. I politely tell them "No, thank-you." Usually they're not pushy, but one time I was at Thyme Maternity, the cashier told me that I had to give them my address so that they could put me in their system. I knew that this was bullcrap, and I called her on it. She finally left me alone. I really hate it when stores push you to give them your address - ESPECIALLY when I know that they can't force you to provide you with that information.

So two hurdles down. One more to go. Next I was asked if I wanted the anti-stretch-mark cream that they sell. I'd been thinking of getting some of that stuff anyway, so I took the bait. Then I was told that if I bought two bottles of the cream, I'd get the third one for free. The one bottle was already $20 and I had no idea if it was even any good, so why the hell would I spend $40 on TWO bottles just to get the third one free??? Thanks, but no thanks.

Three hurdles later, I was finally able to pay for my merchandise. At least they didn't bug me when I told them that I didn't want a bag and that I didn't want my clothes wrapped in tissue paper. Bleh. I really like the clothes at Thyme Maternity, but their employees really need to work on being less pushy.

Week 27

2008-05-21T14:04:00.001-04:00

Overall, the allergies have treated me well this week. Unfortunately, just when I thought I could go about normal life sans tissues and hack attacks, my allergies came back with a vengeance on May 10th (the day I was at my friend's wedding). They were fine-ish during the actual wedding, which took place in the morning. By the time we'd made it over to my parents' place to celebrate Mother's Day that evening, my nose was stuffed, and I was in perma-sneeze mode. Fortunately, that seemed to have been the worst of it, and the rest of the week played out as smoothly as one can expect for going through allergy season sans medication.

Now the TRUE highlight of the week was HypnoBirthing. My classes started on May 13th, and they'll be running for 5 weeks total. To my delight/surprise, the class was relatively small - there were only 4 other couples in the class. I much prefer the smaller groups due to my introverted (with extroverted tendencies) nature. I find it a lot easier to interact with others and to speak up more readily and freely.

The class itself was taught by two doulas, Natasha and Amanda. Both are as nice as can be and pretty down-to-earth, which makes the classes very enjoyable. My only complaint is that I found the first class a bit poorly-organized. I don't hold it against them though, because it was the first time that they were teaching the class, and it was the first time that they had to set up in that classroom. I would normally be pretty miffed by the fact that neither of them had taught HypnoBirthing before, but I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt. They've done their HypnoBirthing instructor training, and they are, doulas after all. Isn't their job to be soothing and supporting throughout childbirth?

As far as first impressions of HypnoBirthing itself go, I think that the class made an even more positive impression on me than I'd originally had from my preliminary research. Even the hubby seemed into it. When I'd first told him that I'd wanted to take HypnoBirthing classes, he looked at me with much skepticism, advising me to research it so that I could be sure that it was money well-spent. After all, it IS rather pricey - ~$350 for 5 weeks! Unfortunately, the term "HypnoBirthing" evokes images of a bunch of hippies living in a cult-like commune brainwashing unwitting mothers-to-be with their psycho-babble. Of course, that didn't help my cause. So I humored him and did some research. I sent him a number of articles that I'd found online, and I got him to read a few pamphlets that I'd brought home from my pre-natal fitness classes. It didn't take very long to get him on my side, thank goodness!

The more I get into it, the more I realize that HypnoBirthing is a state of mind. It's all about being in a good headspace during the birthing process. As the founder of HypnoBirthing - Marie Mongan - points out, giving birth is a part of nature. If the less "intelligent" animals can do it without drugs, why can't we? Unfortunately, throughout history, childbirth has evolved from something perfectly natural and relatively stress-free, to this horrid, painful experience that requires medical intervention to "get it over with". Total horse-pucky.

If you can get past these societal taboos around childbirth, then that alone is a HUGE step in the right direction. The next part of the philosophy is to learn to RELAX. I'll be the first to admit that I am NOT a relaxed individual. I fidget. I get nervous when I have nothing to do. I always need to have everything scheduled. I think that's why this HypnoBirthing experience will be positive for me. If I can learn to be a calmer, more relaxed person, then that alone is a huge success for me! Some of the breathing exercises that we've done in the past couple of weeks have been great so far. I already feel myself becoming a more relaxed person, which is huge for me.

The only thing I'm not quite sold on is the hubby's role in coaching me on my breathing during labor. We've both agreed that that's just not "us". I do, however, believe that we can tailor what we've learned (and are learning) in our HypnoBirthing classes into a birthing process that works for us, so that doesn't worry me at all. I was never a stickler for following the rules word-for-word anyway - my baking is edibly yummy proof of that!

WOW

2008-05-15T22:37:00.003-04:00

Today was the day that I saw my new not-downtown-but-closer-to-home-nonetheless OB. I had already been mildly impressed by the fact that his secretary had called and left such a detailed message (complete with the doctor's Web site) on our voicemail. Was this a taste of things to come? Drum roll please...

YES!

All I can say is that I am bloody impressed! After filling out a series of never-ending forms, we had to sit for a while. That didn't bother me so much because I've learned to accept the fact that doctors are seldom on time. Sad, but true.

I scanned the waiting room. It wasn't too full. There were two couples and one woman on her own. One couple caught my eye. I would best describe them as Angelina Jolie in the movie "Hackers" married to Harry Potter. :P

In scanning the room further, I noticed that the walls were plastered with thank-you cards from his obstetrical patients. Some patients got really fancy and made him really fancy picture frames with a collage of pictures of their new-born baby. Some were just plain old thank-you cards with really nice messages thanking him and his staff for their services. My impression from seeing all of these pictures is that he really loves what he does and his patients know it too. If they didn't appreciate him as a doctor, I doubt that they would be sending him these nice pictures.

I talked to the nurse about my medical history, had my blood pressure taken, and was weighed. I was weighed on one of those old-school scales where they fiddle around with the counter-weights to figure your weight, so I couldn't read the number, and I wasn't able to steal a glance when she wrote it down. But I digress...

So, the nurse was super-nice. As far as doctor's office nurses go, she definitely didn't fit the mold of nonchalant and bitchy. In fact this was the complete opposite. She was cheerful and chatty, and definitely made me feel at home.

After waiting a bit longer, we got called into the doctor's office, where we waited a teensy bit for him. As far as doctors go, this guy is super high-tech. He had a couple of printers, a digital camera, and two LCD monitors - one facing him, and another facing his patients. Impressed I was!

Enter the doctor. Tethered to him was a med student. I'd read on his Web site that he often has med students interning with him. I think that's a fantastic idea. The doctor himself was a very pleasant British fellow - love the accent! He was very chatty and didn't at all make us feel like he was trying to push us through an assembly line of patients. After a brief chat, he told us to go to the room next door to see the baby. Pardon?

I did a bit of a double-take because, given my recent experiences, I was led to believe that only movie doctors had ultrasound machines on-site. I guess I was wrong. This doctor DID have an ultrasound machine on-site.

Since it was my first visit to his office, he did a more extensive exam. He performed an abdominal exam, did a pelvic swab (bleh), checked my heart rate, and of course, did the ultrasound. He also measured my preggo belly - apparently it's 27cm, which he deemed normal, so who am I to complain.

The ultrasound machine wasn't one of those big fancy machines that you see in the ultrasound labs. It was a bit fancier than the little laptop ultrasound that was used on me when I fell several weeks back. The setup in the room was pretty cool. There was an LCD monitor facing me as I lay on the bed. This screen was hooked up to the ultrasound machine so that I could look straight ahead rather than turn my neck to see what was on his little monitor. I have to admit that I didn't really see much, but he saw what he needed to see, so that was good enough for me. According to him, the baby is in breech position, and my placenta is apparently a posterior placenta. He wasn't too concerned over the fact that PK is in breech. After all, she has 3 months to invert herself. In the meantime, I think I'll take the advice given in my pre-natal classes and start watching TV on all fours for 10 minutes a day. Not the most elegant of positions, but if it means that I'll avoid a c-section, then so be it.

After the exam, we went back to his office where he gave us a PowerPoint presentation (!) outlining office hours, patient expectations, basic pregnancy nutrition, emergency contact information, etc. I swear this guy just kept impressing me!

Before we left, we were given a little folder with some pamphlets about the doctor, the hospital, and a hodge-podge of other things.

I think that today was the first time that I actually saw my healthcare tax dollars put to good use. It's a shame that most doctors are apathetic and treat their patients like they were part of a huge assembly line. The little things done at his office to make us feel important make a world of difference. Also knowing that I can e-mail him with questions, that there's an after-hours # where I can reach him, and that he works for an hour on some Saturdays and Sundays are nice touches. Doctors don't need to do these things, and most doctors don't. It's just nice that there's someone out there who actually cares about what he's doing.

So I guess at this point, even if an OB affiliated with a hospital closer to home happened to pop up, I don't think I'd go for it. Today's experience made me realize the value of good medical service. When you've got a good thing, you definitely don't want to throw it away.

Oh, so close!

2008-05-15T11:21:00.003-04:00

Last Saturday, I was at a good friend's wedding, and at our table, the hubby and I met a couple with a 3- or 4-month-old baby boy. I swear they are the nicest people ever, and it was great to share pregnancy stories with them. Their son was a cutie too. Is it me or are all babies looking extra-cute these days?

Anyway, I was talking to the the mom, Nancy, about my OB woes. She started telling me about how great her OB was, how she was located out of one of the downtown hospitals, and how she was most likely taking new patients. Score! So we came out of the wedding with a treasure-trove of information - the name of Nancy's OB, the name of her son's pediatrician, and her contact info. Yay! More moms I can hang out with once PK is born!!!

Anyway, I called her OB first thing on Monday morning, and to my disappointment, found out that she was not taking any new patients for August. Damn, I was so close! Hopefully we have better luck on the pediatrician front. I've also got the name of my sister-in-law's pediatrician, so hopefully one of these 2 will pan out.

In the meantime, today I am scheduled to see my new doctor at the closer hospital. His secretary left a nice lengthy message on our voicemail the other day, confirming the appointment, their location, and the doctor's Web site - how modern! That's a pretty good sign, and I'm hoping that this will be a little less self-serve than my experience with my old OB.

In a nutshell, my visits with my old OB consisted of him hearing PK's heartbeat on the Doppler, him asking us if we had any questions, and the grand finale..."Take your vitamins!" Oh, and my questions were usually answered with, "Call MotherRisk to find out." MotherRisk is # you can call if you have any questions on what you can and can't eat during pregnancy. Aren't doctors supposed to know these things? Sheesh...

Anyway, I digress. So today, visit with new OB. I hear that the hospital he's affiliated with is pretty swanky too, so that makes me feel good. Yay! :) I'll let you know how it goes.

Mother's Day

2008-05-12T09:02:00.003-04:00

I never think much of Mother's Day apart from splurging on my mom. This year, I bought her perfume, a couple of books, chocolates, and even made her a quiche. I like to spoil her because she's been great to me and has always been super-supportive, even though we tend to have our creative differences (and there can be a LOT of those).

This year, being pregnant and all, has taken a slight deviation from the status quo. My mom bought me a Mother's Day card (very sweet of her), and my boss left a box of chocolates on my desk last Friday wishing me a "Happy 1st Mother's Day". It was a really sweet gesture and almost made me tear up - damned pregnancy hormones! Nice gestures aside, is it "right" (for a lack of a better word) for me to celebrate Mother's Day when the little one is still relatively safe and sound (barring any more falls - *knock on wood*) in the womb, away from what will surely be a very fumbly first few weeks (maybe more) of motherhood once she enters the world? I guess it's a bit of a slippery slope.

The hubby was a bit freaked out when he realized that I'd gotten Mother's Day gifts from my mom and my boss, and when my grandmother started asking me over the phone yesterday if he'd gotten me anything. I guess with me pregnant, he thinks I'm a ticking emotional timebomb and that not getting me anything this Mother's Day would put him in the doghouse. Damn, am I really THAT bad in my preggo state??? :(

Anyway, I wasn't mad. PK's not out of the womb yet, so to me, it doesn't count just yet. I wonder how it'll be next year. Will I expect some sort of fanfare around Mother's Day, or will it be "just another Sunday" to me? I like celebrations, but I don't like being the center of attention in that way.

I sometimes have a hard time picturing what it'll be like once PK is born. I know that life will change significantly, but I just can't fathom HOW MUCH it'll change. I know that my life and my actions are very centered around me (and around the hubby too) at the moment. I still have the delusion of being able to hit the climbing gym again soon after PK is born, but I know that realistically, it may be a while longer. All I know is that I want to integrate PK into our lives, rather than run our lives around PK. I've seen it done, so I know that it's possible. I guess it's a wait and see game. I won't figure things out until showtime, so for now, I'll just sit pretty and continue with life as I know it, until life's little curveball is born.

And who knows...next year, the PK blog may even have a gushy Mother's Day entry.

The Name Game

2008-05-08T22:27:00.002-04:00

People keep asking me if we've come up with any names for the baby. The answer is yes and no. We started looking at names when I was at 12 weeks. The boy names came really easily. I suggested 2 names, and the hubby took to them immediately. No questions asked. My top name was his top name. Easy peasy! The girl names, on the other hand, have been tougher. Our initial brainstorming session did yield an initial short list of girl names; however, none of the names we came up with tickled my fancy the way the boy names did. I didn't worry too much, since I was pretty convinced that PK would be a boy. It turns out, however, that PK is a girl, according to two different medical professionals.

Since I wasn't totally satisfied with our initial list of girl names, it was back to square one. We tried baby name sites. We bought a book. Let me tell you - there are A LOT of weird names out there. I definitely think it's cool to have an original and/or unusual name, but within reason. Parents-to-be need to realize that kids can be evil little brats and they'll pick on other kids over ANYTHING, including a name. So Apple, beware of playground bullies. If you get beat up, blame mommy Gwenyth Paltrow. (What was she thinking?!)

I am also opposed to weird name spellings. If you want to be original, at least pick an exotic name. And by exotic, I mean a person's name that exists from another culture, not some made-up crap name that will get your kid beat up in the schoolyard (see previous paragraph).

I was born in Brazil, and I thought it would be cool to have a Portuguese name. Unfortunately, most Portuguese names, to me, sound dorky, especially when you anglicize them. Compounded with the fact that the hubby is of Scottish and British descent (as WASPy as it gets!), I can't even imagine what it would be like for him to try to pronounce (let alone spell) a Portuguese name. My own name anglicizes nicely, so the hubby has no trouble with spelling and pronounciation. :P

I'd also considered French names, but that puts us in the same pickle as the Portuguese names. I also thought that a Shakespearean name would be neat, but I haven't encountered a Shakespearean girl name that is the "it" name.

I really like the name Ariel, but the hubby says it reminds him of the character in "The Little Mermaid". Too bad. It's one of my favorites. I also like the name Aïda (as in title character in the Verdi opera), but the hubby thinks it's too weird. Too bad. I loooooooooove the umlaut! Pooh on him. :P I would also love a name with an accent. I think the name Padmé is cool because of the accent, but the kid would NEVER live down the "Star Wars" reference. That's up there with Nicholas Cage naming his kid Kal-El. Oy...

We did finally come up with a short list of girl names (around 3 or 5 names), though I think that it has been narrowed to two candidates. They are easy to spell and easy to pronounce. They are Anglo-ish names, which is probably good, given the hubby's super-WASPy last name. :P The problem? We both like both names; however, he really likes one name, and I really like the other.

Now in case you're wondering, I'm not sharing names until showtime. I got the idea from my sister-in-law. She and her husband did that when they were expecting their first child, and I think it worked out well. EVERYONE has an opinion about names, and some people can be quite adamant about it. We definitely don't need that right now. Unfortunately, when we told family that we weren't sharing our baby names, I got some serious lip service from my side of the family. My mom and my sister both said something along the lines of, "But why wouldn't you tell ME?", and my grandmother is completely disturbed by the fact that we don't have a name for the baby, and she doesn't know what to call it. I would've told her about the PK nickname, but try explaining that to a 75-year-old Brazilian lady. Not easy.

I did cave and tell my mom the boy name, but it was after we'd found out that we were having a girl, so no danger. Even so, I got so much criticism for that one name, that I'm really glad that I didn't reveal the girl name. Besides, I think that the hubby would not have been too pleased about that one. I think that part of the reason why we won't quite settle on a girl name is to stave off prying family members. If we don't pick a name, we don't have to tell them that we've picked one but aren't telling. I guess we've picked two but aren't telling, but oh well. :P In the meantime, I get name suggestions from my mom and my grandmother every so often. I smile and nod. I love my mom and my grandmother, but it's our decision, not theirs.

As for the middle name, THAT was easy. Call me weird, but I don't like middle names, which is pretty funny considering that the hubby goes by his middle name (big long story around that one). My aversion to middle names might be an upbringing/cultural thing. In Brazilian culture, the child's middle name is the same as the mother's maiden name. I guess it's more like a surname than a middle name, really. At any rate, I told the hubby that I would like PK's middle name to be my maiden name, and he agreed. (Did he really have a choice? :P) So I guess in the end we get the best of both worlds. I retain a bit of my culture, and PK ends up with a North American name that the hubby can both spell and pronounce.

Third Trimester

2008-05-08T09:48:00.002-04:00

My third trimester officially starts today! I totally can't believe it! My belly has really popped out in the last little while, and I think my bellybutton is about to invert itself. Not terribly excited about that (sorry, all you "outies" out there :P), but I have been assured that my bellybutton will return to its "innie" state post-partum. Yay!

I'll try to post more belly pictures in the coming weeks. :)

Week 26

2008-05-08T09:22:00.003-04:00

Week 26 has by far been the worst week for allergies. Although the difficulty breathing subsided somewhat this week (it popped up on and off at night), the coughing was incredibly intense! My coughing fits were so bad that people at work thought I was some inconsiderate diseased employee, spreading my germs around the office. I took every opportunity I could to tell them that it was "just allergies" and that I wasn't contagious. Because I would wake up coughing 1-2 times during the night for an hour, sometimes, sleep had become somewhat of a luxury. The only thing that comforts me is the fact that the trees will stop pollinating and my nose will once again be happy.

Although my allergies didn't keep me from attending my aqua-fitness classes, I did opt to work out at home on Yoga day. I figured at a) I was really tired and could use the rest, and b) my coughing fits would probably not be too welcome at a Yoga class. :P Fortunately, I am happy to report that this week, the coughing has subsided significantly! Yay! Unfortunately, I am still sneezing and blowing my nose like crazy. That's okay, because I can at least sleep on a stuffy nose.

In other news, we found out that our baby furniture has arrived. The crib and the dressers had arrived a couple of weeks earlier, but we were still waiting on the glider. Well, the wait is finally over! Now we're expecting a call from the delivery company to arrange a date and time for delivery. It'll be nice to have the room all set up. I will post pictures as soon as the furniture comes in!

I mentioned earlier this week that I got referred to a new OB (somewhat closer to town). As I've said, it's not the perfect location, but at least it's accessible by subway. Beggars can't be choosers!

To continue on the news front, we finally got word that work will be starting on our kitchen. It's scheduled to begin on the last week of May. I sincerely hope that it's finished by late July, and that PK hangs in until the work is done. HA! :P I'm just happy that the work will be starting!

Last Saturday we attended an "Infant/Child Choking and First Aid" course. Like the "Journey into Childbirth" course that we'd taken one week earlier, it was held through Baby and Me Fitness. As I'd said before, we were extremely happy with the Journey into Childbirth course overall. I can't say the same about the first aid course. It was supposed to last for 2 hours, and only lasted 1.5 hours. On top of that, the guy who taught the course was clueless, and showed us outdated VHS (!) videos from the 80s (!) featuring industrial safety and first aid, with next to no focus on infant safety and first aid. The only useful things he taught us were what to do when an infant is choking (conscious choking only), and how to perform infant CPR. The highlight of the class was the fact that it was a mix of expectant parents and parents with babies (<1 year). Both the hubby and I were quite amused by the babies to either side of us. :)

Anyway, everyone was pretty pissed about the outcome of the course, and one girl actually complained to one of the owners of Baby & Me, Trish (who also teaches the Tuesday night aqua fitness class). Needless to say, Trish was pretty pissed by what happened, and is taking action to ensure that everyone who attended is properly compensated for this cluster-flub. Apparently they've been running this workshop for years, and have never had this happen before. From the sounds of it, the guy who came in last Saturday was a substitute (and a bad one, at that). I'm really glad that something is being done about this, because we've been very happy with the services provided by Baby & Me overall. I think that this shows a lot of class and integrity on their part, so kudos to them! And yes, I still definitely 100% recommend this program for anyone who wants to do pre-natal or post-partum fitness in the GTA.

Doctor Update

2008-05-05T23:11:00.004-04:00

Today I got some good news regarding the OB situation. My current OB's office called me this morning indicating that they'd managed to get me an appointment with another doctor who is located a little closer to (my) home. Both the new doctor's office and the hospital are on the subway line, which means that we won't have to drive to get to appointments, so it's at least a bit more accessible. It's by no means an ideal situation, but I think it lessens the stress.

That being said, I'm still waiting to hear back from my family doctor's office to see if they can get me an appointment with a downtown OB. I want to keep my options open, after all. :)

Going High-Tech

2008-05-05T23:01:00.000-04:00

This past weekend I bought myself a BlackBerry 8320. That's the one with built-in WiFi that the mobile phone carriers in Canada don't want you to have because they can't charge you their ridiculous data service rates. But I digress...

I figured that I'd get one for when I go on matleave so that I can stay connected to the outside world without having to be chained to a bulky laptop. (I never thought I'd ever say THAT!) Anyway, I found out that I can make blog posts via my BlackBerry, so here's my first crack at it!

Week 25

2008-04-28T17:27:00.004-04:00

This has been an eventful week so far. On Saturday, we finally hauled our butts over to Babies R Us to set up our baby registry. I swear we must've spent about 2 hours there. It was fun to walk around and pick out all of the different items, but if the wedding registry is any indication of things to come, I'm sure we'll end up with

a) Tacky, useless items NOT on the registry which we'll have to return later
b) People buying us a lot of the same stuff because they don't look at the quantity of a particular item (e.g. bibs)

Oh well...I guess I'll just have to wait and see. We put a lot of stuff on the registry so that hopefully it gives people lots of options. We don't know that many people, so I am under no delusion whatsoever that all of the items off the registry will be purchased.

Yesterday we attended our "Journey into Childbirth" class. We signed up through the Baby & Me Fitness program. The woman who taught it is actually one of the program's founders and also teaches the Monday yoga class. She's super-nice, very informed, and we really enjoyed the class. The class ran from 10am to 5pm so it was a really early start for us for a Sunday (I know that we're in for earlier starts come August). There were 8 couples in total attending the class, which was great. The small group made for a very comfortable and relaxed atmosphere. Topics covered included:

1. Anatomy (I can't believe how squished my intestines will become in a few months!)
2. Childbirth & Labor
3. How life changes after baby arrives
4. Breastfeeding
5. Post-partum depression

Lots of information to take it, especially in 6 hours. I asked lots of questions, but some of the couples there were pretty hard-core and were taking lots of notes. I figure that I probably won't be looking at the notes again anyway, so I didn't see much point in taking notes. I think that my only complaint would be that the course would be better suited for 2 days rather than 1 day. Otherwise, it was a very enjoyable and informative experience - even the hubby liked it!

Finally, I've got a bit of an update on the OB situation. Last Friday I went to see my family doctor (who is located downtown) re: my allergies. They've been getting progressively worse, including breathing through my mouth. I was worried about not being able to breathe at all one of these days, so I made an appointment for Friday afternoon.

The good news is that I'm not wheezing, so no inhaler is required. He said that an inhaler would probably not be the greatest idea since I'm pregnant. That being said, if you need one, you need one. I don't, at least not right now, and hopefully not for the next month. *knock on wood* He suggested Benadryl, but I want to avoid taking any medications if I can, so he said that if I wanted to go au naturel, that I could try getting a humidifier. We bought one on Friday, and I *think* that it has helped somewhat, but it's really hard to say. It rained today, so that helped with the stuffy nose, but I'm coughing like mad. I'm obviously living in the wrong country...

Anyway, after I talked to him about my allergies, I mentioned my OB problem. He seemed pretty confident that he would be able to get me someone at one of the downtown hospitals near me. His approach is vastly different from that of my current OB. All he did was send out a form to the hospital to ask who's available. My OB's office actually contacted specific doctors. Hopefully my family doctor's approach yields better results. He seemed quite confident about things, but honestly, I'll believe it when I see it. I'm clinging on to that wee little bit of hope. We'll see if anything comes of it. :) Keep your fingers crossed!!!

Baby Sounds

2008-04-26T22:32:00.005-04:00

Today we FINALLY made it to Babies R Us for our baby registry (in spite of the fact that the a-holes from the TTC decided to strike with NO NOTICE WHATSOEVER). While we were there, we picked up a device called the Summer Heart-to-Heart Prenatal Listening System. This neat little device straps onto your belly and lets you attach two sets of headphones to listen to your baby's heartbeat and movement. For $30, I figured, what the heck. Worst-case, the thing ends up not working. I figured it was a small price to pay for the ability to hear PK's movements.

When we got home, I anxiously hooked it up, and lo and behold, the darn thing actually works! I even managed to record the sounds directly to my computer. Disclaimer: the recording doesn't really do it justice, but still, a souvenir is a souvenir. I took two recordings. The first one is of PK's heartbeat. It's faint and you'll have to jack up the volume on your computer, but it's there. The second one I managed to take while PK was kicking like mad. You can make out the heartbeat too, but the kicks are the highlight. You'll know that you're listening to the kicks when you hear a staticky thump. Enjoy!

PK Heartbeat
PK Kicking

Week 24

2008-04-24T14:21:00.002-04:00

The nice thing about having a summer baby is being pregnant in the spring and summer. I don't really notice it during the wintertime, but as soon as the perma-gray skies give way to nice sunny blue skies, I swear my mood changes. It probably helps that I've been able to wear skirts and sandals for the last week or so. Yay! Of course, on the downside, it adds fuel to the climate change fire. Having 20C weather in the middle of April is NOT normal. But that's a rant left for my other blog.

Anyway, nice weather = me in a happier mood. So Week 24 has been very pleasant overall. Well, EXCEPT for the fact that trees are sprouting leaves, which means ALLERGY SEASON. I've developed allergies to tree and grass pollen in the last 10-15 years, and it gets worse every season. Basically, I'm severely allergic to EVERY BLOODY NORTH-AMERICAN TREE, and minorly allergic to grass. This means that I spend anywhere between 1 to 1.5 months sneezing, coughing, difficulty breathing, and stuffy nose. Allergy medication helps somewhat, but this time around, with PK in utero, I've avoided the allergy meds. I'm told that anti-histamines are perfectly safe during pregnancy, and I'd like to believe that, but: a) anti-histamines seldom ever work for me anyway, and b) I'm sure a study will come out down the road that says that taking anti-histamines during pregnancy causes Scaly Dragon Tail Syndrome. Bottom line: no meds if I can help it.

I've noticed that my symptoms have gotten progressively worse over the past few weeks (I think that the oak trees are sprouting leaves, and they really mess w/ my allergies), which really sucks, but I'm hanging int there. I think my office mates are freaked out by it though, because my sneezes are loud enough to wake the dead, and I really do sound like I'm sick rather than having an allergic reaction to tree pollen. Oh well. Hopefully the trees will be done with their mating rituals soon so that I can have my nose back.

One highlight of my 24th week was going bra shopping. Well, if you call that a highlight. I decided to go bra shopping after a rep from one of the local bra/lingerie shops did a talk about maternity and nursing bras last week at my Tuesday night swimming class. I figured I've never been properly fitted for a bra, so now's as good a time as any to go.

I dragged the hubby to the store on Saturday, and walked out with 2 maternity bras and a nursing bra. I feel really bad though, because he didn't even get to see me try them on. I was with the fitting lady the entire time while he sat in that estrogen-filled store along with all the other males who were dragged there by their respective partners. On the bright side, I treated him to a date that night, so hopefully that made up for things.

Anyway, back to bras. Apparently you're not supposed to wear underwire when you're pregnant because the wire squishes your milk ducts and could possibly lead to clogs and/or infections (not sure which). Sucky. Then again, I had small boobs before (an A or B cup - not really sure which, to be honest), and now I wear a friggin' D cup - oy! - so I guess the push-up underwire bra isn't really needed. The only thing I wanted was front padding. Don't want to be telling the world when I'm feeling cold, thank-you very much.

Same deal with the nursing bra. No underwire...but no padding either. I did, however, get a pair of Lily Padz, which are like nursing pads but instead of being cotton, they're silicone. That means they're re-usable and supposedly I won't leak milk all over the place when the milk finally does come in. More importantly, they serve as nipple shields. Besides that, I can wear them post-nursing with halter tops and tank tops with an undershelf bra. Yay! The nursing bra itself is nothing super-special except for the fact that you can peel the front off, Janet Jackson style, which the hubby found very amusing. :P

So there you have it. More than you ever wanted to read about bras and boobs. Just wait until I talk about the Great Breastfeeding Conspiracy. That will be a topic for another day. Enough on boobs for now.

Body Image

2008-04-23T12:06:00.003-04:00

Last night's topic of discussion for my aqua-fitness class was "Your Changing Pregnant Body". Granted, we've covered this before, and I've talked about it before in a previous post. I will, however, rehash this topic, because there were a few interesting revelations from last night's discussion.

First off, I'm not the only one who is pissed off at the changes in my body. Yay!!! Many girls complained about how they were once and exercised a ton, and then once they got pregnant, they gained all this extra weight and are having a hard time coping. My instructor, who has had 2 kids and is super-skinny even shared with the group that she gained a ton of weight for both pregnancies, in spite of her best efforts to exercise regularly and eat well. Her main take-aways were that:

1. You gain what your body is pre-disposed to gain. Basically, if you happen to be genetically-unfortunate and gain a ton of weight during your pregnancy in spite of trying your darndest to live a healthy lifestyle, you're stuck. Not a pleasant thought, but I guess it's a painful truth.

2. You WILL lose the weight. Easier said than done. You have to want to lose the weight, of course. It's not like it will automagically melt away as soon as you give birth. But I guess her point was that even if you gain a bunch of weight during pregnancy, it IS possible to lose it. As she pointed out, it takes 9 months to make a baby, and 9 months to lose that baby weight. I guess time will tell on that one.

Sure, it's easy for me to sit here and write about this because I haven't gained a ton of weight from my pregnancy. I try really hard to eat well and exercise regularly, but I guess my genes are helping me out too. My mom never gained a ton of weight when she had my sister and me. I guess that helps.

Yet, even though I haven't gained a ton of weight, I STILL have body-image issues. The fact is, I'm NOT as thin as I used to be. I CAN'T fit into my pre-maternity pants without wearing a Bella Band. Even before I started showing, I was having trouble fitting into some of my shirts because my boobs got too big. But yesterday, as each of us talked about how we felt about our bodies during pregnancy, I felt a little guilty. Most of the girls complaining about their weight had said that they were skinny before they got pregnant, and now they were fat. I complained about my weight, lamenting that I could no longer rock climb or play squash, or rollerblade. I complained about the fact that my boobs looked too big. I complained that I couldn't fit into my clothes. But of all the people who complained, I probably came off as being the one with the least to complain about.

Does that mean that I was less justified to complain? Probably. I guess this was an eye-opener of sorts. I work hard to not gain extra weight, but some of the weight I haven't gained was thanks to Nature. I've been spared (knock on wood).

As I reflect upon last night's discussion, I come to the realization that women will never be satisfied with their body image, even if they look perfectly fine. Case in point, I have a friend who is ridiculously ripped. Toned arms and legs, and six-pack abs. She sees a personal trainer regularly, and watches what she eats. And you know what she told me one day when we were clothes-shopping? She said that she couldn't shop anymore because she was having a "bad stomach day". If the girl with the six-pack abs was complaining about her stomach, is there any hope for the rest of us?

Sure there is. But I guess it proves my point - we'll never be satisfied with our bodies because there's always a better body to be had.

A Sign of the Times

2008-04-23T11:35:00.002-04:00

How's this for modernity: my friend's wife delivered a baby girl yesterday afternoon, and he sent out a text message to share the news. Ah, we sure have come a long way, haven't we? Back in the day, a phone call was the way to share the news. Convenient, but time-consuming nonetheless, since you can't really broadcast news live like this over the phone. I can only imagine what it was like before phones were invented. Did people just hop on their horses and tell their friends and neighbors? Did they send out letters to friends and family who lived far away? Most likely, I'm sure.

Anyway, I think broadcasting great news like this over text message is a great idea. Short, sweet, and to-the-point! :)

Belly Games

2008-04-22T08:56:00.002-04:00

Last night, PK was kicking like mad. I wanted to share the vigorous kicking with the hubby, so I plopped his hand on my belly and we just sat there on the couch while she kicked. Needless to say, it was entertaining. To add to it, he decided to poke my belly (gently, mind you), and to our surprise - and extreme amusement - PK poked right back! So cute! It was like we were bonding as a family. Awwwwwwwww...

This reminds me of something I saw this past weekend. On Sunday the hubby and I decided to take a nice long walk downtown (it was really really nice outside). We passed the ROM during our walk, and I remember seeing a man, a woman, and their baby, sitting by the steps. The man and woman were sitting side-by-side, and the baby was facing them in a stroller. What amused me was the fact that the man and woman were just staring at their baby, completely mesmerized and completely oblivious to their surroundings. It made me think back to when my niece was born. She was such a novelty, even as a newborn who didn't do much other than wriggle and writhe around. Yet, we could've just sat there for hours, staring at her take in the world. I guess that's what it was like for this young couple.

Maternity Clothing Conspiracy

2008-04-21T09:05:00.002-04:00

I'm pretty convinced that there's a maternity clothing conspiracy out there, to dress mothers-to-be in the tackiest clothes ever. I think that's why so many moms get "mom cuts" and start wearing ugly clothing. They've been brainwashed into tackiness during pregnancy, and so they just continue the trend into motherhood. I think that's it.

Now that the weather is warming up, I thought it would be nice to get a few maternity skirts. I like wearing skirts and dresses all summer long if I can, and I don't think that just because I'm pregnant, I shouldn't continue the trend. I've got a couple of skirts that I can actually wear while pregnant, but I figure I want at least 2 more pairs that I can wear, hopefully in a similar style, so I can wear once I regain my figure as well. Variety is the spice of life, after all. :)

Anyway, yesterday, I set out to look for maternity skirts at the inexpensive stores that sell maternity wear: H&M, Old Navy, and GAP. Oh, they had maternity clothes all right...but a) they were tacky and b) they had no skirts (or if they did, they were butt-ugly). Bleh. So much for going the inexpensive route. I guess I could've tried Thyme Maternity, but at that point, I was annoyed by the shopping mall and annoyed by the fruitlessness of my search, so I decided to return to my little piece of maternity wear heaven: Rhonda Maternity.

We got there just before closing, and in 10 minutes, I'd managed to find 2 skirts which matched my search criteria. Piece of cake. Yes, I spent almost $200 on 2 skirts (GASP!), and no, I was not planning on spending that much $$$ on 2 skirts, but I did try the cheapie route, and it failed me. At least I know that I won't look frumptacular and that I can wear them post-partum. Was it worth the $200 then? Yes.

Is there a maternity skirt conspiracy out there? Yes. Why do I say this? If there was no conspiracy, I would've been able to find my skirts at the cheapie places. No such luck. QED. So skirts are taken care of. Now I just have to worry about finding some pairs of shorts and a few dresses. I dread shopping for shorts because I know that the only crap that I will be able to find will be those stupid crop pants (ugh) or capris (double-ugh), or Bermuda shorts (triple-ugh).

Now I understand why so many pregnant women try to borrow maternity clothes from friends/family...

Week 23

2008-04-20T10:15:00.003-04:00

As this week drew to a close, I began to come to grips with the fact that it is 90% likely that I will not be delivering PK at a downtown hospital as I'd originally wanted. It's a real shame, since there are 4 hospitals within 7 minutes from my house, plus another 2 that are still close enough. And there isn't a single OB affiliated with any of these hospitals who is willing to take me on for an August due date.

Last week I was so desperate that I called the Pre-natal and Labor Triage division of the hospital I'd gone to after my fall, to see if maybe the OB that saw me there could see me. HA! Instead, I was lectured on how you can't just call up a hospital for these sorts of things. That I need a referral from a doctor (been there, tried that), and that I should go to the Web site for the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario to get this information. I really really wanted to yell at that rude bitch on the phone for being so snarky with me, but figured it wasn't worth my energy. I checked the Web site because I am desperate after all, but the Web site is not up-to-date, so the 3 hits that I got from my OB search turned out to be duds. I've also asked a few friends with downtown OBs for their OB names as well, just in case. I'm not too hopeful, but it's still worth a shot.

In any case, it is what it is. As the Rolling Stones say, "You can't always get what you want". I guess that's life for you. At least I have somewhere to deliver PK and at least I have an OB. And what's really important is for PK to come out healthy. Can't ask for more. :)

On another note, I've decided to get my butt in gear and sign us up for some pre-natal (non-exercise) classes. Next weekend we're taking "Journey into Parenthood", which is a day-long crash course on parenting. The week after, we're taking an infant first-aid class. And finally, in mid-May, I'm hoping to sign up for a Hypnobirthing class. It's a 5-week class, held once a week for 2.5 hours. I first heard about Hypnobirthing at my pre-natal exercise classes. It's supposed to be kind of like Lamaze in the sense that they teach you breathing techniques and all that. But from my understanding, it's more than just that. It's about being in a good state of mind (i.e. calm and in control) during labor. The idea being that if you're in this good, positive space during delivery, you can have a much more pleasant birthing experience. Plus I figure it's a good way to cleanse myself of my "glass half-empty" mentality. :P The end result is that you're in a better position to give labor without the dreaded epidural, which I want to avoid at all costs. It took a bit of work to convince the hubby to play along, but I think he realizes that pleasing a pregnant woman is far better than living with a crabby one. :P

Baby Bump at 24 Weeks

2008-04-20T10:11:00.004-04:00

With all this talk about being pregnant, I haven't even posted any pictures of my belly. So here we are, without further ado, my 24-week-old baby bump!

Baby Bump at the Office

2008-04-15T09:33:00.003-04:00

I've been having fun noticing how people react to my baby bump as it has evolved over the past few months.

When I first started showing, people at the office would CONSTANTLY stare at my belly, DYING to ask me if I was expecting. I'd say that 99% of them were too nervous to say anything, on the off-chance that I was gaining weight. I say off-chance not because I'm cocky, but because people at the office know that I'm a workout nut, with my rock-climbing, weekly squash games, and epic walks to work with giant backpack in tow. Obviously I knew why they were staring, but opted to play dumb and see if they'd work up the nerve to say anything.

Some brave souls DID ask me in the early stages of the baby bump, and all of these brave souls - 3 of them in total - were women. No guy dared ask me, though if any guy DID notice a bulge, they probably thought that I was just getting fat - a main contributor to the awkward stares described above, I'm sure.

As my belly has grown, people have gotten braver and have asked me flat out: "So when are you due?" I guess at this point, seeing that I haven't really gained much weight anywhere else, it's pretty obvious that I'm pregnant. Either that, or I get fat in really weird places. :P A question like that still takes me by surprise, though, because it's so bleepin' blunt. Not that I care either way. I just find it surprising/funny.

In the last few days, the comments about the baby bump have gotten more amusing. I guess I spend too much time sitting at my desk, or at least not that much time roaming around where my former teammates roam, because I think that some people around here really had no idea that they were pregnant until they ran into me recently. I guess this isn't a gossipy office, which is a good thing. Today's office comments take the cake:

Comment #1
Comment: "Oh, I didn't know! Congratulations!"
Translation: "Holy crap! You're pregnant, but if I say 'pregnant' and you're not really, then I'm in trouble, so I'll just sound kinda wishy-washy and hope that I'm right."

Comment #2
Comment: "Oh, it took me a while to notice! Congratulations!"
Translation: "Crap! Am I a bad person for not having noticed sooner? Hopefully the hormonal pregnant lady won't get mad at me!"

More fun-filled comments to come, I'm sure!

The Baby Room

2008-04-14T21:54:00.005-04:00

This past weekend, we finally decided to tidy up the mess of boxes in PK's room. When we moved into our house, we knew that our spare bedroom would be used for our potential kid (PK :D), so we left it empty until just after my first trimester. That was when we slowly started filling the room with clothes, stuffed animals, and books. In the last few weeks, we've added on a playpen, our beloved Bugaboo Bee stroller, and the car seat, all sitting pretty in their boxes. That is, until yesterday.

It all began on Saturday, when we ventured out to Ikea to look for a mirror and light fixture for our downstairs washroom (which is being re-done as part of our kitchen renovations). Finding the mirror and light fixture was a dud (though we've discovered a lot of tacky crap out there), but we did come out of the store with area rug and a bookcase for PK's room.

We decided to put the bookcase together on Sunday because after spending a couple of hours at Ikea, we were spent. Ikea is always a zoo, especially on weekends, and always sucks the life out of me.

Putting together the bookcase is a one-person job, so I let the hubby take care of that while I worked on the Bugaboo. The only assembly required for the Bugaboo was to pop in the 2 front wheels and that was that. The real tough part was in trying to figure out how to collapse and un-collapse the Bugaboo. It took me a while (and nearly hurling the damned thing out the window), but now I've got it all figured out. PK will be a very mobile city baby. :P

Even though we still don't have our glider and the rest of our furniture in the room (hopefully in the next month or 2), the room is looking more like a baby's room now that the bookcase is up.

A few people have asked me if we're going to go with a themed baby room. The answer is no. Themed rooms don't tickle my fancy. Babies are too young to care either way, so I figure I might as well save Future Me and Future Hubby some time by going with a non-themed white-walled room. Even our furniture was picked under the premise that most of it will stay with PK until she goes off to university. I guess some people dig the themed room and view it as part of being part of the whole experience. Hey, if that tickles their fancy, then so be it. If we were all the same, life would be mighty boring, wouldn't it?

And now, without further ado, here are some pictures of PK's room (a work in progress). More pictures to follow as our furniture comes in. :)

The Hubby hard at work

The Bugaboo Bee!

Pile 'o Stuff

The Finished Product 1

The Finished Product 2

Week 22

2008-04-14T21:12:00.003-04:00

A couple of incidents during the week opened the floodgates of emotion, which always catches me by surprise. I'm always shocked by the utter lack of control that I feel when something triggers a strong emotional response in me these days. I've definitely had to learn to adapt to this, since I can't afford to lose it at the office. I don't want to be seen as one of those hormonal pregnant women, plus I do think it's rather unprofessional, especially when leading a team. That being said, I am human and not some robot. I guess the trick is to have your emotional breakdowns with grace. :P

The pre-natal exercise classes are going well. Last week was my first Tuesday off since the Symphonic Band went on summer break, so I decided to attend an extra aqua-fitness class. I figured that my Tuesdays were normally booked anyway, so I might as well replace that timeslot with an extra exercise class. Overall, I'm pretty pleased with things. The Tuesday aqua-fitness class is definitely more rigorous than the Thursday class, which is great. I was so tired after that class that I slept like a baby. Ditto for the Wednesday Yoga class. The instructor really has us work hard, but I feel great and relaxed after the class is done. Plus I also slept like a baby that night. :D

The topic of discussion in the Yoga class was cloth diapers. Toronto has one diaper service company, called Comfy Cotton. The way it works is that they deliver ~10 clean diapers AND pick up your dirty diapers at the same time (once a week). Even though the diapers are cloth, you put an outer shell (with Velcro tabs) over top of the cloth diaper so that the baby ick doesn't make a mess everywhere. It's definitely food for thought for a few reasons:

1. It is claimed that cloth diapers decrease the overall amount of time that a baby spends in diapers (and if I have it my way, PK will be out of diapers as soon as she starts walking).

2. Cloth diapers are more environmentally-friendly. That being said, Comfy Cotton does have to use chemicals to clean its diapers, which aren't the best for the environment. At the same time, they do claim that they use more environmentally-friendly practices for cleaning their diapers. You win some, you lose some.

The idea of going with cloth diapers does seem enticing. At the same time, I don't know if I'm quite ready to take the plunge. Another alternative I'm considering is the G Diaper. In some ways, they're like the cloth diaper in that they have an outer shell, but the inside is a disposable, plastic free diaper.

I figure we've got a couple of options to work with at least. Hopefully we'll make up our minds by the time PK makes her world début. :)

A Clarification or Two

2008-04-09T12:52:00.001-04:00

One day, somewhere around the time just before becoming pregnant, the hubby and I were at his parents' place for a visit. I don't remember the specifics of the visit, except for one thing. During the course of the visit, my mother-in-law pulled out a journal that she'd kept while pregnant with the hubby. I remember thinking at the time how that was such a cool idea, and thought that when I became pregnant, I'd keep a journal as well. When I found out that I was pregnant with PK, I remembered my journal idea, but I didn't put it into action until my first trimester was almost done. The main reason behind my inaction was that I was petrified of starting a journal, only to have something go terribly wrong with the pregnancy so early on. So I waited until I was at 10 weeks or so to start writing.

My original intention was to keep a paper journal, but I type far faster than I write. I'd considered keeping a Word version of my journal, but that just seems so impersonal. And then I thought of the blog. I already had a blog, and I didn't really want to mix the baby stuff in with that blog, so I decided to create a brand-new blog. One dedicated solely to PK. And so, PK on the Way was born.

I was talking to a friend yesterday about the blog, and she asked me who my intended audience was, stating that what you write is largely influenced by who you write it for. So very true. I guess the answer to that question is that I'm writing for myself, mostly. I enjoy writing, especially when it's done on a whim. I seldom ever sit down with the intention of writing. It just happens. I don't claim to be a great writer, but I still enjoy it. If writing were my destiny, I would not be in IT, would I? The second person I write for is the hubby. I didn't realize it at the time, but after talking to him about it yesterday, I really do. Even though communication is not a barrier in our relationship, he finds that he doesn't always know what I'm thinking/feeling with regards to the pregnancy, and that this is a great way to let him in on my thoughts. Cool! Of course, I also write for PK. I still do think that when PK grows up, she will be terribly embarrassed by this blog, but hopefully she'll reach a point in her life (maybe in her mid-20s) where she'll look upon this blog as something neat. Only time will tell.

I am rather pleasantly surprised by this blog's readership. I've given the URL to a few friends whom I thought might be interested in tracking PK's progress in the womb, but I seem to have acquired some readers outside of that select circle, which I think is awesome. I don't think that my other blog gets nearly that much attention, which is fine too. I just like to rant. :) One of my favorite things is reading the reader comments, even if I disagree with them. As the hubby puts it, the fact that people comment means that I've written something provocative enough to make them want to comment. How neat is that? So thanks to everyone who reads the blog and who enjoys commenting. I'm glad that you find it entertaining in some form or another.

Now, for another clarification on this whole pregnancy thing. I probably sound like a bitter bitter bitch sometimes on my blog. I think the tone is somewhat set on purpose. I just tend to find that the most interesting things to write about are the ones that get me all riled up. I'm just not the "la la la...pregnant life is perfect and awesome" type. And before anybody fires off a bitter angry comment, bear with me for a bit.

First off, I am happy to be pregnant. That being said, I don't enjoy BEING pregnant. Weight gain, constipation, frequent trips to the washroom, trouble sleeping, and cutting back on exercise to me aren't exactly selling points. At the same time, I KNOW that there are tons of women out there who can't get pregnant and would look at me as an ungrateful bitch. I hear you. I've read the literature. I know how bloody hard it is to get pregnant. There are a number of factors that have to line up in just the right way to make this happen. I know that it is a PRIVILEGE to carry a new life form inside of you. I also know how fragile a pregnancy really is (believe me, I know). I don't take my pregnancy for granted, but don't expect me to enjoy every minute of my pregnancy out of guilt. Now you may comment. :)

And one final thing regarding my feeling uncomfortable with the special treatment I get while being pregnant, because I don't think that I got the right point across. The reason why it bothers me when people open doors and keep asking how I'm feeling and all that is BECAUSE I'm pregnant. I know that under normal circumstances, these same people wouldn't give a flying pig about how I'm doing. That's just fact. So I'm bothered by this because I know that it's somewhat hard-wired into us by society and is not an act of genuine concern. The other thing is that at this point in my pregnancy, I stick out like a sore thumb. There's no way you can look at me and tell me that you didn't know I was pregnant. Standing out like that makes me feel uncomfortable. I even felt uncomfortable at my own wedding, where all eyes were on me. I stuck out. I was the lady with the big white dress. Hard to miss. :P

So hopefully this clarifies some things about this blog and about my personality. I hope that my readers continue reading and commenting, that I continue entertaining them in some form or another.

Stressed

2008-04-08T10:48:00.002-04:00

Today is one of those days where I feel completely distraught, and I can't quite put my finger on it. There's nothing really wrong per se. Work is fine. PK is kicking away (either happily or grumpily). The weather is nice. I don't seem to be blowing up like a balloon. Nothing wrong, really.

But I feel distraught. I haven't slept well for the last couple of nights. On Sunday night, I woke up at 5am and spent the next 2 hours tossing and turning until my alarm went off. Last night I woke up distraught several times, and had a weird dream where I was being attacked by snakes. Besides that, it feels like every other day my calf muscles on both legs go into spasm in the wee hours of the morning, waking me up with a jolt and leaving me limping with tight muscles the next day. Can't figure out what that's all about.

So here I am, totally distraught, unable to concentrate on my work. After giving it a bit of thought, I think I've boiled down my distress to 4 major items.

Getting a Downtown OB
I've been seeing my regular OB/GYN for my pre-natal visits, which has been good because I really like him, but he's all the way out in north-east end of the city. I don't want to be driving at least 30 minutes come delivery time to a hospital way out there, when I could deliver at a hospital that is a 10-minute walk away from my house.

I've told him since the end of my 1st trimester to get me a referral to a downtown OB, and now, 22 weeks into the pregnancy, I still don't have a downtown OB. The one to which I was being referred isn't taking any new patients, and I'm on a waiting list for 8 others who haven't gotten back to his secretary to see if they can take me. Unfortunately my due date is on August 7th, 2008 - one day before 08.08.08. Toronto has a huge Chinese community and the number 8 is super-duper lucky in their culture. This means that many Chinese couples will be either having babies on that day, be it naturally or via C-section. Guess where that leaves me? F!ed.

Kitchen Renovations
We are currently renovating our kitchen. Well, sort of. We've put in our deposit, our design is finalized, and the materials have been ordered. Unfortunately, the work won't start until mid-May, AT BEST. That's because the cabinets won't arrive until then (if everything goes well) AND that's depending on whether or not their contractors are available to start on that date. So at this point, I'm not too optimistic that the work will be done before PK is born, and that stresses me out.

Maternity Leave Plans
That's still up in the air because I haven't heard back from my manager to see if I can swing some funky creative plan at work. Plus we're on the waiting lists for a few daycares, but a waiting list is a waiting list. What if by the time I'm back at work, we don't have a daycare to which we can send PK?

Parenting
The more I think about it, the more I wonder what kind of a parent I'll be. The hubby is great with kids, but me...well, I act like I've got a giant pole up my ass when it comes to kids. Plus, as I've seen with my own life, no matter how well you plan for your life and for your kids' lives, Life always throws you a curveball to interfere with your plans. What if I end up with a freaky Goth kid? What if my kid turns out to be uninterested in school? What if my kid succumbs to peer pressure (the bad stuff like drugs and gangs)? You can only do so much, but in the end, they're the ones making the decisions, and there's nothing you can do except give advice and see things unfold.

So yeah...I guess I know why I'm distraught. I wish I'd at least resolve one of these problems in the near future so I can cross it off the list of worries. Writing about it helps a bit though, so I guess it'll do for now.

Beatlemania

2008-04-07T22:12:00.002-04:00

So it looks like PK is a Beatles fan. She was pounding away at my belly this evening as I caught up on blog posts and listened to the Beatles "Help!" album. Like mother, like daughter. As long as she isn't into Springsteen like her daddy... ;-)

Bleh to Special Treatment

2008-04-07T21:43:00.006-04:00

I've been told by more than one person that I should enjoy the perks of being pregnant - namely, all of this extra attention. To be perfectly honest with you, I actually find it a bit annoying.

I have found people to be extra-nice to me, asking me how I'm feeling, and paying a heck of a lot more attention to me than they ever did before. I don't like it one bit. You might think that this sounds completely crazy, but the way I look at it is that I'm still the same person. So unless I'm wearing some sort of magic potion that makes everyone love me all of a sudden, I am VERY suspicious of all of this sudden attention.

Another thing that bugs me is that people seem to think that I'm in some fragile state. At work, people ask me every day how I'm feeling. I'm starting to wonder if I'm looking really sick or miserable or something, because I haven't felt like crap since my first trimester ended and since I got over the cold marathon that followed.

Besides that, whenever people at work see me carrying something heavy, they always try to grab the load from me or refuse to let me carry any heavy stuff when I offer to carry say a laptop or a projector. Little do they realize that I walk 2-3 km to work every morning with a gigantic backpack, and walk back from the grocery store each week with 2 bags and a backpack. Tsk tsk...

I've also had people open doors for me more often now that I'm pregnant. This really bothers me for some reason, especially when people give me the sympathetic "oh, you're pregnant" look. Ugh. I haven't yet had someone give up their seat for me on the subway, which is a quasi-relief to me. I feel fine right now (maybe I won't be saying this when I look like I swallowed a beachball a couple of months down the road), so I really don't want people giving up their seats for me. I think that the only reason why nobody gives up their seat for me on the subway is because you can't tell that I'm pregnant when I wear a jacket. I'm sure that won't last for long, but hopefully summer will be here soon so that I won't have to worry about whether or not I can fit into my jacket.

I'm such a whiner, eh? ;-)

Week 21

2008-04-07T16:58:00.002-04:00

Week 21 started off with a bang, but not in a good way. Well, kind of. I had my ultrasound that morning, and that was pretty cool. I always enjoy seeing little PK on the monitor. The not-so-good start to the week happened after my ultrasound, as the hubby dropped me off at the subway station on his way to work. I had just gotten out of the car, and started walking towards the subway entrance when I found myself falling back. Fortunately, this time I had something to hold onto - a short wall - which kept me from falling. Whew! That was a close one! What's with me and slipping near the entrance to the subway? Sheesh...

Apart from that, there was no other excitement of that magnitude to report, thank goodness. The other major highlight of the week was that we got some major baby shopping done on the Saturday. We invited the in-laws along for the ride, which was fun. I think my mother-in-law enjoyed it more than my father-in-law did though. At one point we found my father-in-law fast asleep on one of the gliders on display.

We decided to return to Lil' Niblets to do our shopping, since they carried both the stroller that we wanted and the bedroom set that we liked. The shopping trip proved to be fruitful. We spent a bloody fortune, but we bought our big items: crib, a couple of dressers, our beloved Bugaboo Bee, a car seat, and a super-cool glider. The glider cost a bloody fortune, but it is the swankiest glider ever. A far cry from grandma's rocker. The Bugaboo is a bit on the high end too, but the fact that the thing collapses all in one piece and doesn't take up an entire subway car had us sold. We are city folk so mobility and compactness are important.

After taking a brief self-imposed hiatus from my pre-natal exercise classes due to my fall, I was back to taking my Yoga and aqua-fitness classes. I can't remember if I mentioned this, but I switched Yoga sessions. The Yoga class is offered 2x per week, and I'd just picked a session at random. I had to attend a different session one week due to a scheduling conflict, and, although I think the instructor is a bit too new-age for my taste, she does offer a more rigorous Yoga class.

As of April 1st, the symphonic band that I play with is on break for the summer, so I'll probably pick up an extra exercise class now that my Tuesdays are freed up. I'm sure PK will appreciate the break, since for the second half of our season, I was playing the Eb clarinet for most of our pieces, AND I sat beside the piccolo player too. My ears are pretty shot after that...at least she's got the amniotic fluid to shield her wee little ears.

Week 20

2008-04-07T16:57:00.001-04:00

I'll admit that I'm a bit late posting something for week 20. I blame it on work. I think I've become more of a workaholic lately. I guess in some ways it's a good sign - not loathing my job has made me a much more agreeable person to be around. :)

Anyway, I've been scratching my head all day trying to figure out what to report on for this week, but I really can't think of anything. I guess the "highlight" of that week (if you can call it that) was my falling on my lovely pregnant behind and spending the better part of that morning in the hospital. But I've already bored you with all the gory details. :P

Lay Off My Belly!

2008-04-01T09:49:00.002-04:00

Now that I'm starting to really show - enough that my arsenal of maternity clothes has gone from 3 shirts and 2 tanktops to a whopping 7 shirts and 2 tanktops - people seem to think that I have a sign posted on my belly that says "Touch Me". WTF is up with that??? Before getting pregnant, my abdomen was completely uninteresting to the general public, and now, everyone seems to think that it's public property. Not cool.

I've read in my pregnancy books that this is a common occurrence, but I guess I didn't quite believe it until now. After all, IT MAKES NO SENSE. Unfortunately, I'm too shy to say "Stay the F! away from my belly, you creep!", so I just smile and laugh when they touch my belly. Obviously the wrong kind of feedback as it only encourages that type of behavior.

Here are some belly-touching deterrents that I've come up with thus far:
1. Post a big sign on my belly that says "Lay off!"
2. Slap anyone who touches my belly
3. Always walk around with my hands in front of me
4. Touch the toucher's abdomen if they touch mine
5. Spray the toucher with Lysol
6. Rub the toucher's head

How would you deal with this? Any suggestions are welcome!

Matleave Ponderings #2

2008-03-27T21:54:00.003-04:00

About 2 weeks ago, I asked my manager to look into my company policy to see if I could pull off my hair-brained matleave plan. Today he came back to me essentially saying that HR told him flat out that this matleave thing is an all-or-nothing deal. Bollocks, I say! Why would my employer be opposed to having me work part-time throughout my matleave? Sheesh. At any rate, the battle is not yet over. He said he'd speak to a Higher Power about my situation, so we'll see how that pans out. Stay tuned!

PK at 21 Weeks

2008-03-27T21:42:00.002-04:00

Today I had yet another ultrasound - yup, 2 days in a row of seeing PK squirming in my uterus. This time it was one that I had scheduled 2 weeks ago so that they could measure PK's spine. As you may recall from last time, PK was not too favorably-positioned, so the sonographer wasn't able to meansure her spine. This time, however, the sonographer was able to get her measurements, so hopefully that means I don't have to do another one of these for a while. While I do enjoy seeing PK on the monitor, the whole water-drinking thing is rather taxing. At least this time around, the sonographer didn't patronize me, and was actually quite friendly. On top of that, I got her to give me 2 pictures of PK. So without further ado, here's PK at 21 weeks! If you look closely, you might just see her wee little mouth open. :)

Scary Moments

2008-03-26T11:51:00.002-04:00

What started out as an ordinary day turned into a few terrifying hours this morning. Although there's a subway station about 7 minutes from where I live, I typically like to get a 20-minute walk in each morning before hopping on the subway, so I always catch the subway a little further down the subway line. I carry a lot of crap to work, so on a typical day, I sport a gigantic hiking pack. I like it because it's top-loading, I can pack all sorts of stuff into it, and it's really comfortable to carry around, even when it's really packed. I bought it so that I could carry my lunch, change of shoes, water bottle, and whatever else I needed in there. Today was a Yoga day, so I had my change of clothes in there, and my Yoga mat.Today, the plan was no different. Unfortunately, that was not in the cards for me.

This morning, the sidewalks were pretty icy. Normally I'm pretty careful about walking on icy patches, especially now that I've got a little bunkmate. Unfortunately that didn't keep me from taking a fall today. I think it was a combination of my being distracted, along with the fact that the sidewalk looked more wet than it did icy which caught me off guard. One minute, I was walking along listening to my CBC News podcast from last night, and the next, I found myself sitting on the ground. The only saving grace about this whole thing was that I had my giant backpack on, and that cushioned my fall. After cursing under my breath, I got up, and was ready to keep walking per my usual route, but then I changed my mind. I fell right in front of the subway station near my house, so I decided to subway all the way to work.

As I made my way to the subway, I started freaking out. What had I done? I was being a horrible guardian for little PK, who must have been all shaken up and disoriented in there. I started becoming increasingly nervous as I passed a magazine stand saw all of the magazine covers with pregnant celebrities or celebrities who had just given birth. What if something had happened to PK? I don't think I could ever forgive myself for that one. I felt my face turn to stone. I rode the subway like a zombie. I wanted to cry. I wanted the hubby to be there with me. I wanted my mom to tell me that everything would be okay. PK must have sensed my worry, because she started kicking while I sat there on the subway. It was a bit re-assuring, at least, but I was still worried.

I made it into work, in a half-daze. The first thing I did was call my doctor's office to see what I should do. The receptionist said that unless I was feeling cramping or bleeding, that there was no reason to go to the ER. Easy for her to say. She wasn't the one who fell. Feeling uneasy about the "advice" from the doctor's office, I waited for the hubby to call me once he got to work. It seemed like it was taking forever. Why didn't he call? I decided to check to see if there was any bleeding or spotting. None. That was a good sign. No cramps, but I was feeling a sharp pain on the bottom left of my pregnant belly. Panic. Then the hubby called, and I broke down. I was scared. I wanted to know that everything was okay. He suggested that I go to the ER anyway, and that he'd meet me there. Poor guy - drove all the way to Mississauga, only to have to drive back down, still in rush-hour traffic.

When I got to the hospital, the adventure began. First, I couldn't find the ER and had to ask for directions. Then I found the ER, and was frightened when I saw someone sitting there on a stretcher. I scanned the room - relatively empty. Whew. I spoke to a doctor in triage (the triage nurse was busy), and he told me that I'd be better off going to the pre-natal triage upstairs, as they would have better equipment to deal with me. He took me to the staff elevators, and up I went. I got to the 7th floor and was disoriented. Where was this triage place again? Ah, found it. I went in, and talked to the triage nurse there, who proceeded to tell me that I needed to go back downstairs to admissions.

I went back down, in the meantime sending the hubby a text message to tell him where he could find me once he got here. I overshot my floor and ended up in the basement of the hospital. Crap. Back up to the main floor. After walking around a bit disoriented, I found admissions. They did my paperwork, and back up to the 7th floor I went. As I went to catch the elevator, I caught a glimpse of what appeared to be the hubby. It was. Good thing I ran into him, because that way he'd know where to go.

Back to pre-natal triage on the 7th floor. Now with the proper paperwork, the nurse took me to a room, where I told her a bit more about my fall, she hooked up a monitor to my belly, and took my blood pressure. Then we waited. And waited. And waited.

Finally, a med student walked in to take my history. He was really nice and his bedside manner was quite good. I described the fall to him. We talked about the pregnancy and how it had been moving along normally. He asked about bowel movements (how lovely), and did an abdominal exam. He poked around, and felt where PK was hanging out, and where last night's dinner had ended up. When he told me about the location of last night's dinner, I started cracking up. Not something I would've expected to hear a med student tell me in this situation. After the exam, he said he'd talk to the senior resident and staff obstetrician, and would get back to me. More waiting. And waiting. And waiting.

Finally the senior resident rolled in with the med student in tow, and with a little portable ultrasound machine. It looked a bit like a laptop. The ultrasound machine wasn't one of those fancy ones that I normally see when I go for my regular ultrasounds. I think this was used more for eyeballing things to make sure that everything was okay. She did a pretty thorough check, pointing out lips, toes, the cerebellum, the spine, the heart, kidneys, etc. I must've been at a weird angle, because everything looked like a friggin' blob to me. The hubby said he had a pretty good view and could see everything that the resident was pointing out. I'm glad one of us could! The resident was also able to confirm that PK is in fact a girl. She said that she definitely saw a labia, so now I feel less reluctant about calling PK a she. :)

At the end of the ultrasound, the resident decided to let me go home. Normally, if a pregnant woman falls, they tend to keep her around for 4 hours, monitoring for contractions and the like, but she seemd pretty confident (especially after consulting with the staff doctor) that everything was okay. So now, here I am, back at work. PK hasn't been quite as frisky as she was this morning, but I guess that was a fair bit of excitement. Still I do feel her moving every so often as I write out this blog post. I'm just glad that I went to the hospital, just to be on the safe side. And I'm grateful that the hubby was there by my side throughout the entire ordeal. It sure made things better. Knock on wood that I don't have any more scares like this one. I'll definitely be extra-extra-vigilant now when I walk outside.

Family Expansion

2008-03-24T09:38:00.001-04:00

I just found out this weekend that my sister-in-law is expecting her second child. She already has a little girl who will be turning 3 shortly after PK is born. Now with her new baby on the way, PK will have a cousin only a few months younger. Her second child is due in mid-November. It's a pretty exciting time, and I'm sure that Christmas at the in-laws' will be very very busy!

Kickity Kickity

2008-03-24T09:35:00.002-04:00

As I mentioned in last week's post, PK has recently started kicking! It has been a really cool experience, so I've decided to dedicate an entire post to this. Ever since the first trimester ickiness went away, I felt like I've been in a bit of a holding pattern, since, apart from the ultrasounds and my growing belly, I haven't really had any other signs of life from my little lodger down there. I found this really disconcerting, because I had to wait at least 3 weeks between ultrasounds to make sure that PK was okay. What if something was wrong? There was no way for me to know. No kicks to count. No nausea or vomiting or fatigue. So how did I know? Then the kicking started. As I'd mentioned before, it was a little difficult at first to differentiate between kicks and gas. I think I've gotten to the point where I can finally make this distinction.

The kicks are a really odd sensation. They almost feel like someone sitting in a balloon and punching it from the inside. At least that's how I'd envision it if I were trapped in a balloon. :P One thing I've discovered is that PK has a bit of a kicking schedule. She usually goes into a kicking frenzy in the morning, usually when I get to work. She also kicks a bit at lunchtime and a bit at dinnertime (I guess she likes it when I eat). Most of the action seems to happen at night though, at 9 or 10pm. Up until recently, PK has been kicking around my lower abdomen, and usually in the same general area. This has been great because the hubby has been able to feel some of the kicks. He really seems to enjoy that. Sometimes we just sit around on the couch with his hand on my tummy when PK is most active, and just enjoy the baby's kicks. It's a really neat experience.

I also enjoy the kicking when I'm at work. It's like I have company while I'm working, so it gets a little less lonely. Sure, I like to MSN when I'm at work, but it's a different sort of company. It's Take Your Kids to Work Day, at a whole new level.

Of course, it wouldn't be me if I didn't say that this kicking thing brings along with it a whole new set of worries. I think I spent most of last Saturday a bit on edge, because I couldn't feel much PK kicking during the day, not even in the morning when she tends to be frisky. That of course freaked me out. It freaked me out even moreso because I had big-time gas, and was annoyed that the gas bubbles bursting in my abdomen were keeping me from detecting the baby kicks, or had me thinking that they were baby kicks. Then I started thinking, "What if PK didn't kick enough times today? I don't have my doctor's after-hours number. I haven't been referred to the downtown hospital yet. Why won't he refer me downtown? Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!" I calmed myself down a bit as I felt what seemed to be PK kicks, but couldn't be sure because they weren't repeatable (usually they are).

All of this tension in my mind was somewhat relieved when the gas cleared at night (after an entire day of this nuisance). I also decided to do a nighttime workout (10pm), and PK seemed to enjoy that, because right after I was done, I got a real flurry of kicks. Whew! I know...I just can't enjoy a good thing, right?

Today PK is kicking at my cervix, which feels really odd - kind of like a reverse Kegel. It's neat to take note of how she moves around down there. Of course, for all I know, it's not a kick, and is in actual fact a punch or some combination thereof. Perhaps I have a little boxer on the way? Or maybe they are predominantly kicks, and I've got a future soccer player. It would sure make the motherland proud!

Week 19

2008-03-18T13:28:00.002-04:00

This week has been pretty eventful. It started with us finding out PK's gender. It's a huge relief to know, but we seriously need to get back to the drawing board as far as coming up with good girl names. That and the fact that I'm not entirely convinced that PK is a girl. Maybe it's a gut feeling. Or maybe I'm just being myself - never fully convinced until I see the hard evidence: the actual baby out of the womb. Or maybe it's from hearing enough stories from people who were expecting one gender, only to be surprised by the opposite when the baby pops out. At any rate, I still have a hard time referring to PK as a "she". The hubby does it all the time now. It's really cute to watch. I guess I'm just being a bit more cautious. Mind you, deep down inside, I'm hoping that I'm wrong, because I really really want the white and pastel green bedroom set that we saw at Li'l Niblets a couple of weeks ago. :D

Apart from finding out PK's gender, I think I'm finally starting to feel some concrete baby movement. Mind you, some of it still feels like gas, but I'm pretty sure that it's actually PK kicking away. A few weeks ago, in my aqua-aerobics class, when we were talking about the best and worst of pregnancy, some of the girls in my class were talking about feeling the baby kick for the first time. Two things stuck out in my mind from that. First, they said that the baby often kept them awake because of the kicking. Secondly, a lot of them described the sensation as "weird but cool". I was really puzzled by the latter comment upon first hearing it, but now I know what they mean. It IS "weird but cool"! I guess I'd best describe it as someone sitting inside a balloon and trying to push outward. The sensation itself feels like a series of blips. Or maybe "blips" isn't the right word, because it would imply that the movements are slight, which they're not. They're quite pronounced. What surprised me the most though, is that PK likes to kick more than once in the same spot. I don't know why that surprises me, but I guess in my mind, I just expected PK to be all over the place!

This week was also my week to do some maternity clothes shopping. Yes, finally caved and decided to buy some stuff that actually fits me. Mind you, I can still pull off quite a few of my old shirts and tanktops. And for the time being, the pants + Bella Band combination is working out beautifully. That being said, my shirt options are dwindling more and more each day, either because I've got too much girth around my belly thereby causing the shirt to ride up quite a bit, or because my new mega-boobs have made it quite difficult to fit into my narrower tops. Hence, the trip to the maternity store. I'd gone into the store intending on buying maybe one or two long-sleeve tops. I wound up coming out with three long-sleeve tops and 2 tanktops. My store of choice was Rhonda Maternity in Yorkville. You'd think that shopping in a boutique in Yorkville would cause me to break the bank, but it didn't. First off, I don't believe in paying a fortune for clothes (don't get me started on my Gucci or Louis Vuitton rant). Secondly, Yorkville is full of rich snobs who think they're better than everyone. Case in point, a husband and wife were at the maternity store that day, and the husband sounded like he felt he was the maternity fashion guru. I've never seen a guy so much into clothes for his wife. Weird... That being said, the prices at this store are relatively reasonable (probably around the same as what you'd pay for at Club Monaco), and their styles are just gorgeous! I'll definitely come back there for summer clothes, especially since I have a wedding to attend in May. Of course, I'll probably end up buying the bulk of my maternity clothes at Thyme Maternity so that I still have money left over to buy that cool baby furniture!

Drum Roll Please - And the Gender Is...

2008-03-13T12:44:00.003-04:00

Today I went for my 19-week ultrasound (week 19 started today). As per usual, I was lectured for not drinking enough water. I just mumbled and said that I puked out my water this morning and that's why my bladder wasn't full. It was a partial truth, because, just as we were heading out the door this morning, I did get the urge to puke. Since my stomach was pretty much empty, however, there really wasn't much to hurl out.

At any rate, my lack of water consumption didn't stop the technician from seeing the baby properly, so I don't know what all the fuss is about. Well, okay - the technician DID say that drinking water allows her measure the distance from the cervix to the placenta. This logic still leaves me confused because she did a transvaginal ultrasound, and the whole purpose of doing that one was to make sure that everything was cool in cervix-land. But whatever. I have to come back in 2 weeks because she wasn't able to measure the spine properly. We could actually see it on the monitor, but I guess PK was lying with its front to us, so I'm guessing that it didn't yield the best results for measuring whatever it was she had to measure.

Other than those two little blips, the overall experience was pretty cool. First off, PK is quite bigger now, and it's moving A LOT! It was squirming so much that the technician had a hard time getting good still shots of the limbs. Although I couldn't see it myself, she was able to identify 5 fingers on each hand (not sure if she counted toes, but hopefully she did!) and nostrils! The heart was definitely more visible this time. The little gray blip that I saw in early December has sure come a long way! I think I could actually see chambers! The other cool thing (as I'd mentioned before) was the spine. You could totally make it out properly.

Of course, THE highlight of the whole thing is that the technician was able to tell me the sex of the baby. Mind you, as far as these things go, it's all based on whether or not you can see male bits 'n pieces, so there's always a chance of it being wrong. Still, I wanted to know! If I haven't already told you in person (or via my Facebook or MSN status), maybe the suspense is killing you. :P

Okay, so here goes...PK is a girl! That was a BIG shock to me, because I was CONVINCED that PK was a boy. Either one would've worked for me. Though I have to admit that girl baby clothes and furniture is waaaaaaaaaaay cuter than the boy stuff. That being said, boys have WAY cooler toys than girls do. Not that this gender stigma will prevent me from buying Transformers for PK. Tee hee... Of course, the only snag is that we had the perfect boy name picked out, but were a bit on the fence on the girl names. Time to re-evaluate. Those baby naming sites, while plentiful, sure are a lot to digest. I'll leave that discussion for another place and time.

Righting a Wrong

2008-03-09T00:23:00.002-05:00

I am happy to report that I finally have a conclusion to the DBA story. Last week, I finally got up the nerve to set things straight with the DBA. I have to admit that I was dreading this particular encounter. So much so that I procrastinated and procrastinated. I think I waited almost 2 weeks before getting up the nerve to tell her.

Last Wednesday, I finally sucked it up and marched over to the DBA's desk and set the record straight. I started off by apologizing, saying that when she'd asked me if I was expecting and I said no, that I am in fact expecting, and that the reason I'd said no to her before is that I hadn't told my manager yet. So now that the news was officially out I was able to tell her.

She was actually really good about the whole thing - very understanding. Who knows, she might've had a voodoo doll of me stashed under my desk for after I left, but on the surface, she certainly took it well. We chit-chatted a bit about pregnancy, and that was that. Mission accomplished, and a bit weight lifted off of my chest! Whew!

Pre-Natal Class Adventures

2008-03-08T23:59:00.004-05:00

Last week I had had my 2nd week of pre-natal classes - Yoga and aqua-aerobics. As I've mentioned before, I'm really enjoying my time in these classes, especially since the first 30 minutes are devoted to pregnancy-related topics. That being said, I do feel like a bit of an outsider. To be honest, I've always felt like an outsider around other women. I could always relate better to guys than to girls. Guys are very WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get). Girls aren't. There are mind-games. There are subliminal messages. There's competition. There's sizing up. I don't give a snoot about makeup. I could care less about the crap you read on Cosmo. I think sachets are dumb and useless, and I think that getting smelly soaps from The Body Shop has got to be one of the most useless and annoying gifts EVER.

Having spent 4 years in engineering school followed by almost 7 years of work in IT, I've hung around my fair share of guys. I'm used to it. Most of my close friends are guys. I can talk about computers, and I can be totally silly around them and crack dirty jokes without the disapproving look that most girls would give me. Now, being pregnant, I seek refuge with those of the same sex, since, after all, guys have NO IDEA what I'm going through.

So anyway, back to the main topic.

Monday's topic in my Yoga class was breast-feeding. The instructor had us go around the room, saying how far along we were, and how long we wanted to breastfeed. Everyone around me said that they wanted to breastfeed for as long as possible (which actually translated to 1-2 years). Then it was my turn, and I said, "for as little as possible" - i.e. between 1 and 4 months. Dead silence. Clearly I'd committed some crime in preggers-land. To each his own, is what I say. My personal preference is to not have a kid with teeth and who can walk on its own sucking on my boob, thank-you very much. I know some mothers breast-feed for that long, but it's just my personal preference. Who knows...I may change my mind and do it for as long as 6 months, but that's as far as I'll go.

I definitely appreciate the importance of breast-feeding, and certainly the importance of breast milk. That's why even when I stop breats-feeding, I'll probably still feed PK some breast milk for a little while longer. The session was definitely very enlightening, and I learned a lot (probably more than I ever wanted to know but still had to know). For example, milk ducts can clog, and the best way to unclog them is to have the baby suck on your boob (disturbing, I know). Boobs can get hard if there's too much milk in them, so the best way to relieve the pressure is to just manually squirt some out. There's the right and wrong way for a baby to latch onto your boob. Breast milk digests more quickly than formula, and is therefore better to give to a kid over formula in the early days, in order to prevent SIDS. Kids get confused by boob nipples and bottle nipples, so you have to ease them into things. So ...much...information...brain...exploding...

Thursday's aqua-aerobics class was equally-enlightening. We were asked to go around the room and say how far along we were, and list some of our good and bad experiences with pregnancy. When it came around to me, I started going on about how I was nauseous for 3 months. Then when that was all over and I finally got my energy back, I got 3 colds in a row, in the span of 1.5 months. Then I went on to say that the weight gain was a real shock to me, and that I found it really disturbing at first. Finally, I ended off with, "But I guess it's all getting better now, so I guess that's a good thing..." Awkward silence. I'm sure that if anyone was in both the Yoga and swimming classes this week, they'd start referring to me as "crazy anti-breast-feeding pregnancy-hater girl". Hey, I tell it like it is.

I will re-iterate, however, that PK is very much a wanted child. I just happen to be a creature of comfort. What can I say? I like the status-quo. This whole pregnancy thing is totally new to me and it has its ups and downs. In hindsight re: the swimming class though, I should've said that the best thing about being pregnant was PK itself. It's true. I might have a funny way of showing it, but I am glad that PK is on its way.