Matleave Ponderings #1

As I've mentioned in the previous post, I was all ready to take my 1-year off for matleave. After my job situation changed and the work became more interesting (and tolerable!), I started to re-think the whole thing.

Over the last few weeks, I've talked to a few people about my plans. Some of the people I talked to had kids. Others were single and just had an opinion based on what they'd do in that situation. Everyone has an opinion, and to my surprise, 99% of the people with whom I spoke disagreed with my revised matleave plans. Even my boss, when I told him about my high-level matleave plans, questioned why I wouldn't take the full year off.

In fact, most people seem to be pretty appalled. I get a lot of the "You only get to do this once". That makes no sense, because if you end up with a ton of kids (a ton is >1 in my world :P), you obviously do it more than once. I also get a lot of, "There's plenty of time for work." and "Work will be there when you get back." and "You'll change your mind later." All well and good, but I would like to point out that everyone is different. We all have different opinions and different situations. What works for one family doesn't work for another. My decision is both hard and stressful enough without having everyone and their brother give me their opinion on what I should do, and thinking that their opinion is the definitive way of going about it.

All I ask for is a little bit of support and faith. I am not going to be cuel to PK. I will not abandon it. Working part-time for part of the year isn't abandonment, especially with both sets of grandparents living within a 30-minute drive from us. Having work ambitions isn't criminal. When I enjoy my work, I take great pride in it. I want to do as well as I can. I work hard, but I don't pull insane hours. If I wanted to do that, I would've stayed in consulting and might have never gotten married, let alone be having a child. I'm a big fan of work-life balance, and I think that PK will bring even more balance to this crazy life of ours.

So smile, and be happy for me, knowing that PK will be loved and will be well-taken care of. :)