Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Can't Hide It For Much Longer...

So I've been putting off telling the good folks at work about PK's impending arrival. I've mentioned that a couple of times, so I won't re-hash the reasons why. At any rate, I am showing somewhat, and the trained maternal eye will most likely notice first. I don't suspect that guys would necessarily notice because, no offense, they tend to be a bit more oblivious to these things.

To prove my point, I cut my hair a couple of weeks ago. It was sitting about 5cm below my shoulders, and I had it cut to just above my shoulders. So basically 7-8cm chopped off. Definitely a significant chop-chop. None of my guy friends noticed. My female friends, however, did notice.

So where was I going with this? Well, not 5 minutes ago, the DBA for my group came by my desk to ask me for some info. She hadn't seen me for a while, and last time she saw me, I was in my svelte rock-climbing form. Definitely no bulge on the front. After she got the info she came for, she whispered to me, "Are you expecting?" Split-second decision. Do I say anything to her and risk pissing off my managers for not knowing first, or do I just go the Hollywood starlet route and deny, deny, deny? I decided to take the starlet route and said "No." I did, however, unintentionally speak with a slightly indignant tone. All that together probably made her feel super-duper embarrassed for asking and probably made her think that she was calling me fat.

After the "incident", I IMed a friend of mine, telling him the story. Here's a snippet of our IM chat:

[14:17] Friend: Just say you've got a parasitic condition causing you to gain weight and you'd appreciate not letting it get around the office.

[14:17] Me: LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[14:18] Friend: And it's not a lie, persay, some people might think of pregnancy in that way. :$

[14:18] Friend: And then when you're away on a doctor's appointment, people wont ask you about it. :$

Dang, I wish I'd thought of that! :P j/k!

Overall, I feel really bad about being in this type of situation, and I HATE lying, but I can't afford to have other people know before I tell management. I guess that this little episode proves that I can't hide my little PK's existence for much longer. I'm going to have to tell management, and it'll probably have to be on Friday, after my doctor's appointment. Stay tuned!

3 comments:

Fawn said...

I told my boss before I was even done my first trimester (including my last pregnancy, which, of course, ended in miscarriage). I had just started the job and felt guilty about having all this expensive training planned when I was going to be leaving in half a year. In the case of the second pregnancy, I was glad I'd told him because when I had the miscarriage, I really needed to take a day or two off and the office was super supportive of that.

I'm lucky to work in a supportive office, though - don't know what yours is like. Good luck lettting your boss know.

And, at risk of really overstepping the boundaries, I would have a private talk with the DBA and apologize. She's going to know you lied and maybe angry because she DID feel bad. You can just explain that you were caught off-guard and unprepared and that you would appreciate her discretion. I'm sure that would make her feel important and appreciative.

Sorry to sound like I'm lecturing - I don't mean to!

IndyComp0T1 said...

I guess my biggest fear of telling the good folks at work is that they'd start treating me differently. I guess I'm still not used to the idea of being pregnant.

And I absolutely agree with you on setting things straight with the DBA. I've actually felt really guilty about lying to her ever since it happened last week. I've been trying to track her down to explain things, because you're right, she'll be totally POed when she finds out the inevitable.

Fawn said...

I believe you're an engineer, so maybe your office is full of macho-type men. But I found that when I was pregnant in the office, it wasn't really an issue, other than everyone realized that I would be going away for some time, which is inevitable. It was good that everyone was able to plan for my absence, knowing that I would be coming back. These days, lots of dads take parental leave, plus some workers take stress leave, other employees go on disability... It's not like you're somehow a bad employee for being pregnant.

It's such a privilege to be carrying a new life. :)